You know there are habits that would be good for you. Exercising, meditating, journaling, doing the deeper work on yourself...

And yet, no matter how many times you try, you just can't seem to stay consistent.

Maybe you find the motivation when things get really bad, but as soon as life starts feeling better, those good habits slowly fall away again.

There's a reason this keeps happening, and it might not be what you think.

In this episode, you'll discover:

✨ Why waiting until things get bad to start building good habits can keep you stuck in a frustrating cycle

✨ Three common mistakes that make consistency so difficult — and practical ways to start doing things differently

✨ Why the way you feel about yourself can have such a powerful impact on your ability to follow through with the things you know are good for you

Building good habits isn't about forcing yourself to do more or becoming perfectly disciplined. It's about learning how to make positive changes that feel achievable, meaningful and sustainable.

And perhaps most importantly, understanding that consistency doesn't mean perfection. It means learning to keep coming back, even when you've fallen out of the habit. Every time you do, you're showing yourself that you're worth the effort.

💌Share your story - Book your FREE BFPA* Support Call with me

✅VIP Access to BFPA Masterclasses + Workshops

🌟Download your FREE Guide to Stop Skin Picking Using Somatics

🎯Join the 7-Day Skin Picking Recovery Challenge

🤓Sign up - FREE BFPA Monthly Masterclass

✨Join - BEYOND Support Group on WhatsApp

🙋‍♀️Send me a message here

My name is Raffaela Marie. I'm a holistic BFRB coach who has healed from 15 years of chronic skin picking myself and dedicated my life to helping driven women do the same. Through my podcast, free resources, and programs, I teach strategies to overcome urges, build emotional safety, and expand into authenticity. My approach goes beyond quick fixes, focusing on root causes and long-term recovery.

Why can chronic skin picking, hair pulling or nail biting become so incredibly addictive?

You know the behaviour is hurting you. You desperately want to stop. And yet, your brain keeps pulling you back towards it again and again.

There’s actually a reason for this — and when you understand what your brain has learned through these behaviours, so much starts to make sense.

In this episode, you'll discover:

✨ How positive reinforcement, negative reinforcement and unpredictable rewards can combine to make picking, pulling and biting incredibly difficult to resist
✨ Why your brain learned to rely on these behaviours in the first place — and why it doesn't mean there's something wrong with you
✨ One of the biggest underlying factors fuelling the addictive cycle and where you can start focusing your healing instead

Your brain learned that picking, pulling or biting could help you escape discomfort AND give you relief, soothing or satisfaction.

But what your brain has learned, it can also learn to respond to differently. And by building your capacity to navigate your emotional world, you can slowly reduce how much you need these behaviours to do it for you.

Resources:

Emotion regulation deficits in skin picking (excoriation) disorder: A systematic review

The clinical phenomenology of skin-picking disorder – Are there any obsessive-compulsive components?

💌Share your story - Book your FREE BFPA* Support Call with me

✅VIP Access to BFPA Masterclasses + Workshops

🌟Download your FREE Guide to Stop Skin Picking Using Somatics

🎯Join the 7-Day Skin Picking Recovery Challenge

🤓Sign up - FREE BFPA Monthly Masterclass

✨Join - BEYOND Support Group on WhatsApp

🙋‍♀️Send me a message here

My name is Raffaela Marie. I'm a holistic BFRB coach who has healed from 15 years of chronic skin picking myself and dedicated my life to helping driven women do the same. Through my podcast, free resources, and programs, I teach strategies to overcome urges, build emotional safety, and expand into authenticity. My approach goes beyond quick fixes, focusing on root causes and long-term recovery.

If evenings are when your picking, pulling or biting tends to get worse, this episode is something you can actually come back to and use when you need it.

After a whole day of doing, thinking and being “on”, it can be incredibly difficult to suddenly slow down. Your body might be tired, but your nervous system is still carrying everything from the day and picking, pulling or biting can become the way you decompress.

This episode is designed to give you another way.

In this episode:

✨ I'll guide you through a grounding practice to help you slow down, decompress and give your nervous system space to regulate
✨ You'll practise coming back into your body and the present moment rather than automatically defaulting to picking, pulling or biting
✨ You'll learn how to meet yourself with more softness and compassion at the end of the day — even if you do find yourself picking, pulling or biting

This isn't a quick fix, and it's not about having a perfect evening where you don't pick at all.

It's a practice you can keep coming back to. And over time, you're building the skills to regulate, slow down and support yourself in the moments you would normally turn to picking, pulling or biting.

💌Share your story - Book your FREE BFPA* Support Call with me

✅VIP Access to BFPA Masterclasses + Workshops

🌟Download your FREE Guide to Stop Skin Picking Using Somatics

🎯Join the 7-Day Skin Picking Recovery Challenge

🤓Sign up - FREE BFPA Monthly Masterclass

✨Join - BEYOND Support Group on WhatsApp

🙋‍♀️Send me a message here

My name is Raffaela Marie. I'm a holistic BFRB coach who has healed from 15 years of chronic skin picking myself and dedicated my life to helping driven women do the same. Through my podcast, free resources, and programs, I teach strategies to overcome urges, build emotional safety, and expand into authenticity. My approach goes beyond quick fixes, focusing on root causes and long-term recovery.

What if one of the most powerful tools for healing from chronic skin picking, hair pulling or nail biting has nothing to do with trying to stop the urge?

Meditation isn't about getting rid of urges. It can help us learn how to notice them, make space for them and not automatically act on them.

And there’s some really interesting research showing us why this can be such a powerful practice.

In this episode, you'll discover:

✨ What the science tells us about meditation, addiction and our ability to better handle stress and urges
✨ Why meditation can be such a powerful tool for healing from picking, pulling and biting without trying to replace the behaviour
✨ How to actually build a consistent meditation practice (even if you have ADHD or have struggled with consistency in the past)

Meditation isn't the solution to chronic skin picking or hair pulling. But it can be a really powerful part of the puzzle.

And you don't need to meditate for 30 minutes every day to experience the benefits. The most important part of the practice might simply be learning to keep coming back.

Resources:
Mindfulness treatment for substance misuse: A systematic review and meta-analysis

Relative Efficacy of Mindfulness-Based Relapse Prevention, Standard Relapse Prevention, and Treatment as Usual for Substance Use Disorders

The neuroscience of mindfulness meditation

How Meditation for Addiction Can Help With Recovery

💌Share your story - Book your FREE BFPA* Support Call with me

🌟Download your FREE Guide to Stop Skin Picking Using Somatics

📝FREE Holistic Skin Picking & Hair Pulling Assessment - (this is no longer available. For this kind of insight and feedback, you can "share your story" with me via the link above)

🎯Join the 7-Day Skin Picking Recovery Challenge

🤓Sign up - FREE BFPA Monthly Masterclass

✨Join - BEYOND Support Group on WhatsApp

🙋‍♀️Send me a message here

My name is Raffaela Marie. I'm a holistic BFRB coach who has healed from 15 years of chronic skin picking myself and dedicated my life to helping driven women do the same. Through my podcast, free resources, and programs, I teach strategies to overcome urges, build emotional safety, and expand into authenticity. My approach goes beyond quick fixes, focusing on root causes and long-term recovery.

If you had a good childhood, it can be really confusing to look at the ways you struggle today and wonder… why?

You might even feel guilty exploring your past because your parents loved you, gave you so much, and other people had it far worse.

But having a good childhood doesn't mean you received everything you emotionally needed.

In this episode, you'll discover:

✨ Why you can have loving, well-intentioned parents and still carry emotional wounds from childhood
✨ How the emotional patterns within your family can help explain struggles like anxiety, people pleasing, perfectionism and chronic skin picking, hair pulling or nail biting
✨ Why understanding your past doesn't mean blaming your parents and how it can actually create more compassion for yourself AND them

You don't have to dismiss the good parts of your childhood to acknowledge what might have been missing.

Understanding both can help you connect the dots between who you were then and who you are today and give you so much more clarity on what you actually need to heal.

Resources:

Understanding Bowen Theory from The Family Systems Institute

Understanding Bowen Family Systems Theory: Enhancing your relationships through emotional differentiation.

💌Share your story - Book your FREE BFPA* Support Call with me

✅VIP Access to BFPA Masterclasses + Workshops

🌟Download your FREE Guide to Stop Skin Picking Using Somatics

🎯Join the 7-Day Skin Picking Recovery Challenge

🤓Sign up - FREE BFPA Monthly Masterclass

✨Join - BEYOND Support Group on WhatsApp

🙋‍♀️Send me a message here

My name is Raffaela Marie. I'm a holistic BFRB coach who has healed from 15 years of chronic skin picking myself and dedicated my life to helping driven women do the same. Through my podcast, free resources, and programs, I teach strategies to overcome urges, build emotional safety, and expand into authenticity. My approach goes beyond quick fixes, focusing on root causes and long-term recovery.

If you’ve tried replacing chronic skin picking, hair pulling, or nail biting with something less destructive and found that, so far, the only result has been more frustration and a sense of hopelessness...

This is because you can't replace it. You've essentially been beating your head against a wall in the hope that it will feel better.

It's not your fault. I did this for years too! Until I found a more effective approach.

In this episode, you'll discover:

✨ Why trying to replace picking, pulling or biting can actually create more stress and frustration
✨ The difference between adaptive and maladaptive coping mechanisms and why this is so important to understand in your healing
✨ What to start focusing on instead of constantly asking, “How do I stop?” or “What can I replace it with?”

These behaviours serve a purpose.

Instead of just trying to get rid of it, we can use it as an opportunity to understand yourself better, recognise the skills you might be missing, and learn healthier ways to navigate stress, emotions and difficult moments.

Resources:

Maladaptive Coping: 15 Behavior Examples & Mechanisms (Peer reviewed article)

How Maladaptive Coping Strategies Maintain Anxiety Disorders (article)

💌Share your story - Book your FREE BFPA* Support Call with me

🌟Download your FREE Guide to Stop Skin Picking Using Somatics

📝FREE Holistic Skin Picking & Hair Pulling Assessment - (this is no longer available. For this kind of insight and feedback, you can "share your story" with me via the link above)

🎯Join the 7-Day Skin Picking Recovery Challenge

🤓Sign up - FREE BFPA Monthly Masterclass

✨Join - BEYOND Support Group on WhatsApp

🙋‍♀️Send me a message here

My name is Raffaela Marie. I'm a holistic BFRB coach who has healed from 15 years of chronic skin picking myself and dedicated my life to helping driven women do the same. Through my podcast, free resources, and programs, I teach strategies to overcome urges, build emotional safety, and expand into authenticity. My approach goes beyond quick fixes, focusing on root causes and long-term recovery.

Your inner critic might be playing a much bigger role in your skin picking, hair pulling or nail biting than you realise.

I've spoken to hundreds of people within this community, and this just keeps popping up in a very meaningful way, so it's time to unpack it together.

In this episode, you'll discover:

✨ What your inner critic actually is and why it’s not your enemy
✨ Why fighting or trying to silence it can keep you stuck
✨ A simple perspective shift that can help you quiet your inner critic and change the way you relate to yourself

Your inner critic has a purpose. Understanding that purpose might just be one of the greatest healing gifts you can give yourself.

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Qs for curiosity - Ask your inner critic this:
For more context and to get the most out of these questions, make sure you listen to the full episode!

• Where did you learn this?
• Where did you learn that that's the truth?
• Who taught you this?
• What are you trying to protect me from right now?
• If you didn’t listen to your inner critic right now, what would you do instead?

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💌Share your story - Book your FREE BFPA* Support Call with me

🌟Download your FREE Guide to Stop Skin Picking Using Somatics

📝FREE Holistic Skin Picking & Hair Pulling Assessment - (this is no longer available. For this kind of insight and feedback, you can "share your story" with me via the link above)

🎯Join the 7-Day Skin Picking Recovery Challenge

🤓Sign up - FREE BFPA Monthly Masterclass

✨Join - BEYOND Support Group on WhatsApp

🙋‍♀️Send me a message here

My name is Raffaela Marie. I'm a holistic BFRB coach who has healed from 15 years of chronic skin picking myself and dedicated my life to helping driven women do the same. Through my podcast, free resources, and programs, I teach strategies to overcome urges, build emotional safety, and expand into authenticity. My approach goes beyond quick fixes, focusing on root causes and long-term recovery.

Do you get to the end of the day and feel restless, dissatisfied or like you haven't done enough?

What if it's not because you've done something wrong or you need to do better, but because somewhere along the way, you learnt that feeling good is something you have to earn?

In this episode, you'll learn:

✨ Why conditional love can make it so hard to relax and actually feel satisfied at the end of the day

✨ How we learn to use our emotions as "currency" and why this can leave us constantly searching for something to make us feel good

✨ A journaling practice to help you shift the emotions you feel stuck in so you can experience more peace, satisfaction and fulfilment

I also share something I've never shared on the podcast before: a raw entry from my own journal after spending seven evenings doing nothing but sitting with myself and my feelings.

This episode will give you a very different perspective on why it can feel like nothing you do is ever quite enough, and a tangible way to start changing that.

💌Share your story - Book your FREE BFPA* Support Call with me

🌟Download your FREE Guide to Stop Skin Picking Using Somatics

📝FREE Holistic Skin Picking & Hair Pulling Assessment - (this is no longer available. For this kind of insight and feedback, you can "share your story" with me via the link above)

🎯Join the 7-Day Skin Picking Recovery Challenge

🤓Sign up - FREE BFPA Monthly Masterclass

✨Join - BEYOND Support Group on WhatsApp

🙋‍♀️Send me a message here

My name is Raffaela Marie. I'm a holistic BFRB coach who has healed from 15 years of chronic skin picking myself and dedicated my life to helping driven women do the same. Through my podcast, free resources, and programs, I teach strategies to overcome urges, build emotional safety, and expand into authenticity. My approach goes beyond quick fixes, focusing on root causes and long-term recovery.