Is there such a thing as a "normal" sex drive? Nope. On this Beyond Monogamy QUICKIE, Adam and Pris get real about mismatched sex drives: the high, the low, and everything in between. Adam, the self-proclaimed every-single-day guy, opens up about a recent slowdown in his libido, while Pris, a lifelong take-it-or-leave-it, explains why talking about sex doesn't flip her switch and why cuddles sometimes beat the main event.

Whether you're in the swinger lifestyle, practicing ethical non-monogamy (ENM), or totally monogamous, libido mismatch isn't a lifestyle problem. It's a human one. And this swinger podcast proves the fix starts with one honest conversation.

In this episode:

• Why there's no "normal" number when it comes to sex drive
• How new medications, menopause, and hormones can shift desire
• Stress, sleep, weight, and body image as libido killers
• Why cuddling can feel safer than sex when life gets heavy
• Masturbation for dopamine vs. sex with a partner: the "whole dance"
• The fear of a low-libido season becoming the new normal
• "If one is down, pick up the other": who initiates when desire dips
• Adam's on-air accountability pledge (comment and ask if he got up and walked!)
• When to talk to your partner, your doctor, or a therapist

Thanks to our sponsors and affiliates:

ProDX Health — At-home STI tests plus hormone tests for men and women, with results straight to your phone. Use code BEYOMONO for 15% off at prodxhealth.com.

FirmTech Tech Ring — A comfortable overnight ring that tracks your natural erections while you sleep and sends the data to your phone to share with your doctor. Use code BEYOMONO at myfirmtech.com/adamalvarez.

Sliquid — When you two are on the same page, Sliquid has you covered. Get 15% off at sliquid.com.

Come hang out with us:

Swinger 101 Workshop — Austin, TX — Sunday, November 15, 2026, 6–8 PM at Forbidden Fruit Austin. Light refreshments, a small fee, and two hours to ask us anything. Details on the Sponsors tab at beyond-monogamy.com.

Krazy Winter Nights — Kansas City — February 19–21, 2027. Use code BEYOMONO for a discount at krazykasbh.com.

Full Swap Radio — Catch us every Thursday at 2 PM and 7 PM Central on fullswapradio.com.

Beyond-Monogamy.com — Merch, every episode, our blog, sponsor discounts, and our 100% anonymous confessional. Tell us where your drive lands! beyond-monogamy.com

What would your life look like if non-monogamy had always been normal? A listener voicemail stopped us in our tracks with that question, so Adam & Pris imagine the versions of themselves that never got the chance to exist. We both grew up Catholic in Mexican-American households with a strict script for what a good man and a good woman were supposed to be. This is one of our most personal episodes yet about ethical non-monogamy, the swinger lifestyle, and how culture and religion shape who we love.

In this episode:

• A listener voicemail asks: who would we be if non-monogamy were normal?
• Pris's childhood crushes, growing up bi in a "don't date outside your race or gender" household
• Adam's "girl-crazy" shame and why he thought something was wrong with him
• Would there be less cheating if monogamy and non-monogamy were treated equally?
• Wanting "the one," having a primary, and why poly didn't work for us
• Could either of us ever go back to monogamy?
• Catholic guilt, Adam's time in the seminary, and why he walked away
• Machismo, toxic masculinity, and finding Latinx couples in the lifestyle
• Our alternate-timeline lightning round: who are we dating at 18, and do we still find each other?

Thanks to our sponsor:

SDC: The largest online community for open-minded adults, with your people all in one place. Make a profile and go explore. Sign up with code 38236: sdc.com/?ref=38236

Come hang out with us IRL:

Krazy Winter Nights, Kansas City: February 19–21, 2027. Use code BEYOMONO for a discount at krazykasbh.com

Full Swap Radio: Catch us streaming every Thursday at 2:00 PM and 7:00 PM Central at fullswapradio.com

Tell us your other timeline: Grew up with rules that didn't fit? Share your story in our 100% anonymous confessional at beyond-monogamy.com. While you're there, check out the merch, past episodes, and our blog.

Where do you actually find other swingers? It's the number one question in our inbox, our DMs, and our confessional, so on this QUICKIE, Adam & Pris break down where the swinger lifestyle really lives: online, in person, and in places you might not expect. We draw on 15 years of ethical non-monogamy experience, wins and misfires included.

In this episode:

• How we got started: Adult FriendFinder, Swing Lifestyle, Kik chats, and the pre-app days
• Free vs. paid accounts on SDC, 3Fun, and FetLife, and which ones fit what you want
• Community vs. casual: why chasing friendships beat chasing sex for us
• The Facebook group method: going from public state groups to private local ones
• AI photos, catfishing, fake profiles, and why Pris verifies everybody
• Red flags: pushiness, one-word openers, and couples' profiles that only show one partner
• Swinger clubs, host couples, newbie nights, and low-pressure vanilla meet-and-greets
• Takeovers, lifestyle travel, cruises, workshops, Reddit, and Discord

Thanks to our sponsors and partners:

FirmTech: The Tech Ring tracks firmness and blood flow with real data in an app, and the Ring Mate attachment is all about your partner's pleasure. Use code BEYOMONO for 15% off: myfirmtech.com/adamalvarez

SDC: The lifestyle's biggest community, with profiles, verification, parties, and travel. Join with code 38236: sdc.com/?ref=38236

3Fun: Quick, on-the-go swiping for couples and singles. Use code TK11932: go3fun.co/ad/TK11932

SwingTap: Tap a ring, wallet, or QR code to share your whole lifestyle profile instantly: swingtap.fun/share/beyomono

Come hang out with us IRL:

Swinger 101 Workshop: November 15 at Forbidden Fruit in Austin, TX. $20 per person, with light refreshments.

Krazy Winter Nights, Kansas City: February 19–21, 2027. Use code BEYOMONO for a discount at krazykasbh.com

Full Swap Radio: Catch us streaming every Thursday at 2:00 PM and 7:00 PM Central.

Join our community: Visit beyond-monogamy.com for merch, every episode, our blog, our 100% anonymous confessional, and the "Join Our Community" link to our Facebook group.