Don't you just hate it when you get up in the morning, feeling all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, only for your fitness watch/ring/jockstrap to tell you you've had the worst night's sleep in the history of all mankind and you might as well just go and lie down in a shallow grave? Us too, and we've had enough!

There's also much to hanker on regarding Jack's Guinness World Record success at Pitbull, and Ash has some animal theories that really should be studied/ignored.

Want to read Eve's Substack? It's here:

https://evewinterscott.substack.com/p/i-used-to-listen-to-steven-bartlett

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Ash has some chilling news to reveal regarding the humble banana, whereas Jack has some stats about the percentage of the population that know the plot to Joseph and the Technicolour Dreamcoat vs the off-side rule that really make you just stop and think about the state of the world today. There's also a HUGE revelation regarding Jack's secret podcast that feels pretty... iconic?

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ME DON'T WANT TO PLAY NO CAT AND MOUSE WITH YOUR SWEET TREATS.

Jack and Ash have hankered on many topics, but the subject of sweet treats is one that turns out to provoke A LOT of strong opinions, like "Almond milk is for punks" and "Marzipan is a friend to no man".

Talking of things small and delicious, Ash has been having steamy dreams about Timothée Chalamet, while Jack has finally figured out what his biggest bugbear is.

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