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Shard's Thugs

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Shard's Thugs

By: Dexter Herron
Narrated by: Dexter Herron
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About this listen

Wiggletooth Shard started off the campaign as a lowly goblin corporal, but when his unit is decimated by the human forces, he steals a captain’s rank and musters the goblins for a desperate counterattack, unknowing that his rag-tag company would soon plunge straight into the heart of the war for the survival of the goblin nation!

His newly formed unit, the Black Dragon Company, is assigned a simple mission, get the goblin princess to the shore, but Shard soon realizes his innocuous assignment is far more deadly. Shard musters all his wit and courage as the humans pull out all stops to capture the goblin princess. Shard realizes that all hope of the goblin nation rides on his shoulders as he discovers the elves’ new secret weapon.

Plagued by his own memories and tortured by dreams of a mysterious elf sorceress, Shard leads his goblins through battle after battle with his only allies; the incompetent Captain Momoo who lost his own company thinking it would get him laid, the brutal Sergeant Major Ribsplitter Jones who’s killed more goblin officers than the elves, the enigmatic Major Bark-Bite who seems more interested in Shard’s past than the war itself, and the lusty, busty, war loving Princess Hiroki who has her own castration machine and a perchance to use it, in a crazy suicide mission across enemy territory against unwinnable odds to save his people.

Shard’s Thugs is laugh out loud funny and an action packed thrill ride from first minute to last. Battle after ferocious battle, armed with a his big sword and guile, he must keep the rambunctious princess safe, outsmart the elves and humans hunting him down, and dodge the lurking shadow of a vengeful black dragon. Shard must succeed at all costs even if the price is his goblin company or worse, their lives!

©2005, 2006, 2015 Dexter Herron (P)2025 Dexter Herron
Action & Adventure Fantasy Funny Fiction War Military Royalty Magic Users
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Listener received this title free

The author seems to have tried to include every obscenity in the dictionary, plus many more made up ones. Many, many times over and over again, The story itself could be quite good, if rather linear, but on the whole is very long, too long. Some of the accents were so garbled that I couldn't make out what was being said. Sgt Jones was the worst, and I could only understand about 25% of what he 'said', Another irritating thing was that the narrator left too long gaps between the dialogue speech and the dialog tag (he said/ she said/ they said etc). Easily remedied by proper editing.
As the author was the narrator as well, this seemed to be a vanity project, and the book needs a thorough editing to make it acceptable. I still have no idea what was going on in the final chapter.

Too long, too obscene

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