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How to Be a Footballer

Narrated by: Peter Crouch
Series: How to Be a Footballer, Book 1
Length: 7 hrs and 36 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (1,534 ratings)

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Summary

Ever wanted to know what it is really like being a Premiership footballer?

Here is the ultimate guide from the much loved everyman of English football, Peter Crouch.

Towering at six feet seven inches, Crouch is prized for his self-deprecating humour, having famously answered the question “what would you be if you weren’t a footballer?” with the one liner “a virgin”. At the same time, he has had an incredible career, from World Cups to Champions League finals. He has scored more headed goals than anyone else in Premiership history and has a better goals-to-minute on the pitch ratio for England than even Michael Owen. A humble professional with a great sense of humour, Crouch is one of the few players that is liked by fans of all clubs. Of course, this is probably because he’s played for most of them.

Now nearing the end of his stellar career, he shares everything he has learnt and tells it exactly like it is in How to be a Footballer, from the most colourful aspects of the game to what really happens on and off the pitch. Honest, candid and great company, this is not your standard footballer autobiography but a true insider’s guide to our favourite sport.

From a legend of English football, this is the most entertaining sports book of the year.

©2018 Peter Crouch (P)2018 Random House Audiobooks

Audible Sessions with Peter Crouch

Meet the author of How to Be a Footballer
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Critic reviews

"The funniest man in British sport." (Metro

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Best footy book I’ve read in ages

Really enjoyed this! It offers a different insight into the crazy footballing world and Crouchy is the perfect tour guide to take you on that adventure!

Well written, well read, just good fun!

Nice swan Crouchy laaaa

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

Fantastic

Great Audio book kept me listening and good narration by Peter Crouch would definitely recommend

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excellent stuff

A funny honest view from a seemingly genuine guy...even if you know nothing much about football it is a great take on modern life and celebrity

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Bobby dazzler

Typical Crouch, honest and hilarious.
A Refreshing change to the usual Autobiography, this is different and brilliant. Although his live for Gerrad should have Abby worried.

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excellent

hilarious, honest and brilliant, I binged it in one or two car trips and couldn't ask for more from an honest and down to earth football book.

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  • Oliver
  • Birmingham, England.
  • 02-08-19

Good read for the curious fan

Brilliant ending that rounds all the off the stories/madness together. Good read if you're looking for a glimpse into the madness of modern football.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Peter Crouch and my Honeymoon!

Currently on my honeymoon just finished the whole book by the pool!! Cheers Crouchy enjoyed very minute and looking forward to the next book!

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Rubbish

Don't bother with this unless you really want to know what music footballers like and what hairstyles all these boy/men prefer.

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Excellent

Probably most honest book of what it's like to be a pro in the world of football that I've ever read/listened too. Excellent

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Funny and insightful

A funny and insightful look into the world of footballers.

Peter Crouch isn't the best narrator in the world, but he's not bad either and it makes it feel a bit more real coming from his own mouth.

A great listen for any football fan, no matter which team you support, and made me laugh out loud on a couple of occasions.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 12-05-19

Fantastic Honesty

Great insight by a great bloke who really loves the game. Great for Saints !