Beside Myself
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3 Months Free
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Offer ends on 15 July 2026 at 11:59 BST.
Beside Myself
Narrated by:
Zara Ramm
Buy Now for £13.83
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Narrated by:
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Zara Ramm
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By:
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Ann Morgan
As gripping as Room, as powerful as Elizabeth is Missing, Beside Myself is the story of twin sisters, a childhood game with devastating consequences and the slippery nature of identity
Helen and Ellie are identical twins – like two peas in a pod, everyone says.
The girls know this isn’t true, though: Helen is the leader and Ellie the follower.
Until they decide to swap places: just for fun, and just for one day.
But Ellie refuses to swap back...
And so begins a nightmare from which Helen cannot wake up. Her toys, her clothes, her friends, her glowing record at school, the favour of her mother and the future she had dreamed of are all gone to a sister who blossoms in the approval that used to belong to Helen. And as the years pass, she loses not only her memory of that day but also herself – until eventually only ‘Smudge’ is left.
Twenty-five years later, Smudge receives a call from out of the blue. It threatens to pull her back into her sister’s dangerous orbit, but if this is her only chance to face the past, how can she resist?
Beside Myself is a compulsive and darkly brilliant psychological drama about family and identity – what makes us who we are and how very fragile it can be.©2016 Ann Morgan (P)2022 Bloomsbury Publishing PLC
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Critic reviews
Morgan’s book is an unsettling performance ... It reads like a particularly ingenious misery memoir ... Impressive
An unsettling, compelling debut about identity and not-so-happy families
This is not just a blisteringly clever novel about identity; it also focuses on the grim hold mental illness can take on sufferers and the challenges they face in an uncaring society
A compulsive, dark and strikingly well-written novel that grips from the first page until long after the last
This disturbing novel describes the damage done when selfhood is compromised, exploring genetics, addiction, depression and the effects of family history. An uneasy read ... But it is compelling
Ann Morgan's Beside Myself is a gripping, savage tale about a lost generation, shipwrecked in a brainless celebrity culture or choosing rebellion, drugs and rage. Full of twists and surprises, this thrilling novel will leave you both shaken and stirred
Elegantly written and there are a couple of nice twists embedded in the narrative … Morgan’s knack is to have us care for both sisters despite their occasionally monstrous behaviour. She makes no excuses for them and sugars no pills – these are three-dimensional characters making the best of a largely awful upbringing **** (Paul Connolly)
A dark tale of addiction and mental illness. This sinister thriller is set for big things
Creepy, clever and compulsive, it will stay with you for a long time
A dark, taut and utterly compelling read
This compelling, dark literary thriller will have you gripped from start to finish
An accomplished read with an excellent plot and a brilliant, multi-layered narrative voice ... Taut and compulsive
A very clever and compelling novel about the ways in which we construct our own identity, and the ways in which it is constructed for us. It's also a poignant reminder of the sense of powerlessness we feel as children, and how firmly and definitively our lives are shaped by others whilst we're still young. I raced through it, but it lingered in my mind after I'd finished it. This is such a powerful and satisfying novel (Rebecca Wait, Author of The Followers)
Psychological chiller about twin girls (always scary – remember The Shining?) who swap places for the day. Identity is more fluid than we thought
Identical twins Helen and Ellie decide to trade places for a day to confuse their parents, but things get out of hand when one sister refuses to switch back
This psychological thriller about mental illness and identity has twists at every turn
Beside Myself is a dark and urban fairytale in which the stuff of nightmares is made literal when twin sisters decide to play an innocuous-seeming game. A most modern and metropolitan fairytale ... Fabulous
An exquisitely written and chillingly suspenseful debut. This story unnerved me in all the right ways with its constant surprises and unexpected twists. Ann Morgan has made her mark with this powerful novel, and I look forward to whatever she writes next
Compelling story
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