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Been Nowhere, Done Nothing

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Been Nowhere, Done Nothing

By: Paul Glazebrook
Narrated by: Paul Glazebrook
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BEEN NOWHERE, DONE NOTHING The brutally honest, laugh-out-loud, and unexpectedly moving true story of life as a British infantry soldier.

Paul "Glazey" Glazebrook didn't set out to write a war memoir. He set out to tell the truth — about growing up on a council estate, about army selection, about the mates who became brothers, and about the chaos, humour, and horror of operational tours from South Armagh to Iraq.

What he wrote instead became one of the most talked-about military memoirs in years — a book civilians read in one sitting and veterans pass between each other like a regimental in-joke.

There's no glorification here. No deep political reflection. Just the real, raw, occasionally filthy truth of what it's actually like to serve — told with the kind of dark, self-deprecating humour that gets soldiers through anything.

Rated 4.9 stars on Amazon and 4.8 stars on Audible, where Paul narrates the audiobook himself.

Whether you served or you've never worn a uniform in your life — this is the British Army as you've never heard it before.

©2025 Paul Glazebrook (P)2025 Paul Glazebrook Espionage Military Military & War True Crime Funny Inspiring Witty Thought-Provoking Heartfelt
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Critic reviews

‘A brutally honest and hilarious account of soldiering from a Rifleman’s perspective’ —Andy McNab CBE, DCM, MM
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from day one the experiences are those of young infanty soliders what they get upto both on and off duty.

true life in rhe infantry

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any man grown up on a council estate working class would enjoy and feel emotion to this life story even if we haven't been in the military. at the age of 50 and having a working class life i feel I could have been part of this story if I had taken a different path and not followed in my father's footsteps. the emotion and grit of a young man to adult hood is all over this along with the grossness of testosterone. very well written and read.

emotional And inspiring

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What a great story from a young soldier, makes you think as a civvy what the men and women have been though serving our country.

The honesty

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A fascinating and hilarious insight into life as a Green Jacket squaddie. Brilliantly narrated, I laughed out loud at the many stories in the book.

I have listened to hundreds of books about life in the British/American military however this one is a stand out listen. The writer is unapologetically graphic and brutally self deprecating. A great insight into the life of a soldier. A truly exellent book.

The hilarious life of a British squaddie

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Gritty down to earth, funny at times sad at others. A great insight into the life of a soldier.

Brilliant

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