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Stopping the RSD Spiral: Reframing Rejection in AuDHD

Stopping the RSD Spiral: Reframing Rejection in AuDHD

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Summary
 How do you interrupt an ADHD or AuDHD rejection sensitivity (RSD) spiral when your neurodivergent brain has already decided nobody wants you?This week on AuDHD for Grownups: F Them Fish, Callie and Jayne explore practical RSD coping strategies, cognitive restructuring, reframing, and how asking for clarity can stop rejection from shaping what you do next.Besties, knowing something isn’t personal doesn’t always stop it from hurting. After a disappointing Halloween turnout, Jayne arrives feeling raw and ready to never host another party. Together, we work through what might help interrupt that emotional spiral before it decides what happens next.Callie shares her personal experience with neurodivergent reframing and cognitive restructuring, bringing curiosity to the conversation: can you notice what you’re feeling, question the meaning your brain has attached to it, and actively ask for the information you’re missing?We dive deep into adult friendships, masking, and the difference between responding to what actually happened versus responding to the fear of what might happen.In this episode, we break down how to stop an RSD spiral:Noticing the Spiral: Recognizing that you’re experiencing neurodivergent rejection sensitivity before acting on it.Questioning the Story: Am I responding to real-time events, or an anticipated fear?Reframing the Hurt: Making room for alternative explanations without dismissing your genuine feelings.Seeking Clarity: How to navigate unanswered invitations and text messages without guessing.Vulnerability in Friendship: Saying something matters to you and asking for a clear RSVP without guilt or blame.Neurodivergent Support: Reaching out to safe people who can validate you and offer an objective perspective.Regrounding Strategies: Reconnecting with activities and relationships that make you feel safe.We acknowledge the Traditional Custodians of the lands on which we live, work, and record, and pay our respects to Elders past and present. We extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples listening.Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome and rejection sensitivity 01:47 Callie’s experience of cognitive restructuring and reframing 05:31 Craft goblin mode and Mardi Gras preparations 06:58 Halloween costumes and trick-or-treating 10:52 The party that brought up feelings of rejection 14:25 When your logical brain knows, but it still hurts 15:57 Asking for validation or another perspective 19:37 When hurt becomes fear of trying again 20:15 What helps Jayne feel loved and grounded 21:48 Rejecting yourself before anyone else can 23:18 Responding to events or anticipating rejection? 24:31 Noticing feelings, reframing, and seeking clarity 25:55 Asking for a response and reaching out for support 27:43 Sharing hurt without blaming friends 28:53 Sour lollies and a side quest 30:31 Journal article news 31:15 Your experiences and closing reflectionsA note on lived experience:We share personal lived experiences of ADHD, autism, and rejection sensitivity. While cognitive restructuring features in our discussion, this episode is not a clinical guide to CBT or a substitute for professional mental health support. Reframing does not require you to deny hurt or treat genuine exclusion as a thinking error.Join the Conversation:What helps you catch an RSD spiral before it takes over? Share your experience, send us a question, and follow the podcast for more honest conversations about neurodivergent adult life.Connect with usEmail: fthemfish@gmail.comYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@AuDHDForGrownups_FThemFishInstagram: AuDHD for Grownups: F Them FishWebsite: https://executivefunctioning.com.auLinkedIn: Callie Elward-Barrett and Jayne Gurton Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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