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You Are the One You’ve Been Waiting For

A New Approach to Intimate Relationships with the Internal Family Systems Model

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You Are the One You’ve Been Waiting For

By: Richard Schwartz
Narrated by: Mike Berlak, Martin LaGrande
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About this listen

Brought to you by Penguin.

Most loving relationships fail, not because of communication or empathy breakdown, but because we unknowingly burden our partner with the task of caring for disowned and unloved parts of ourselves, our 'internal family'.

Building on the revolutionary Internal Family Systems model of therapy, Dr Richard Schwartz reveals how to reconnect and foster a healthy dialogue with your wise and compassionate 'Self' and your partner. You Are the One You've Been Waiting For will equip you with the essential tools needed to build trust and connection with the one you love.

©2023 Richard Schwartz (P)2023 Penguin Audio
Marriage & Long-Term Partnerships Personal Development Personal Success Psychology Psychology & Mental Health Relationships

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Critic reviews

'This highly original book offers critical new insights into obstacles to the dance of intimacy. Most of us have inner exiled parts that carry burdens of shame and abandonment from our past. These interfere with our capacity for intimacy. Dick Schwartz shows us how to use the exiles our partners trigger in us to find and heal the source--our original attachment injuries. This releases our capacity to be fully alive in relationships.' - Bessel A. van der Kolk, MD, medical director, the Trauma Center, and professor of psychiatry, Boston University School of Medicine

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Most relevant
Amazing audio book, very illuminating, I've had an internal revolution whilst listening to it, don't recommend listening if you're in a very vulnerable condition unless you have support around though, it's groundbreaking listening for the ears virgin to ifs and if you're not stable or have support can be very triggering. Major problem though, I was looking forward to doing the practical exercises at the end of the book to find there is no resource for page 89-90 with the list of "protective parts", I can't even go back and listen to where that may be because that's not how audible structures chapters... So, this needs fixing pretty urgently.

Brilliant listen, but practical resources missing.

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Simple yet deep and spiritual model for understanding and working with parts of ourselves who can take us over to protect us or those who have been exiled but can also hijack us. Methods for befriending and using courageous love from our true Self to make those parts of us feel safe and cared for so we can heal ourselves and our relationships. Excellent book which has good narrator with clear and gentle voice.

Fantastic and helpful insight and advice for couples

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Required listening for anyone trying to get better at relationships. As I listened, I was able to make sense of why my relationships had turned out in the way that they had. Previously I'd had a notion. now I deeply understand. Plenty of exploring to follow now. Huge thank you to Dick Schwartz.

Phenomenal, this makes sense of it all!

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This book helped my to look at my relationship and partner in different ways I didn’t before, thank you for such a help

Amazing help for any relationship

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IFS has been the key to understanding myself, loving myself and making huge and real progress in who I am, how I see the world and how I interact with it. This book takes IFS concepts and discusses their application to relationships, it has many profound insights and I would recommend it to anyone.

IFS has changed my life

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