Adulting for Amateurs
Misadventures of a Geriatric Millennial
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Adulting for Amateurs
Narrated by:
Jess H. Gutierrez
Pre-order Now for £12.99
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Narrated by:
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Jess H. Gutierrez
About this listen
In Adulting for Amateurs, Jess H. Gutierrez marvels at how—we can’t avoid the fact anymore—her cohort, the millennials, are approaching middle age. While 1998 seems like just yesterday, we are now grown-ups who feel like we’re still growing up. And at forty-two, Jess has quite a trove of stories to tell.
Jess is leaning into her geriatric millennial years and reflects on how growing up does not necessarily bestow one with maturity. When the dinner covers were lifted to reveal vertically posed sausages, hundreds of the fanciest wedding guests, including the mayor, were treated to a demure and refined Jess’s explosive guffaws. While Jess’s brothers now have wholesome families and responsible jobs, she can’t stop one-upping them, even if it gets her brother nearly fired by a potty-brained prank right before he scrubs into surgery. When Jess and her wife booked their first grown-up vacation, they discovered too late that their Hawaiian trip was to a Mormon resort and therefore completely alcohol free. So Jess and her wife bravely put on their big-girl panties—and slunk off in a makeshift escape from this cheerful teetotaler paradise.
Turns out, even as a responsible homeowner with a mortgage, three kids, and a yard of chickens, Jess might not have matured much beyond her twenties. She’s still the woman who in an earlier era survived queer-dating fails and aughts-era pop culture moments—ultimately discovering that an illegal rave cannot heal a broken heart and that vampire-romance franchises are terrible dating manuals for a budding trailer park lesbian.
Altogether these are the makings of delightful material for this bawdy—sometimes poignant and, dare we say, occasionally wise—new read.
Critic reviews
“As a (possibly geriatric) millennial, Adulting for Amateurs blew me away. Jess’s big personality and honesty shine through in this collection of essays, and I laughed with every page turn.”
—Busy Philipps, New York Times bestselling author of This Will Only Hurt a Little
“Full of nostalgic anecdotes and all-too-relatable stories, Jess reassures us that it’s okay if we have no idea what we’re doing. With humor and heart, Adulting for Amateurs is the perfect guide to prove that growing older doesn’t mean growing up. I needed this book, and you do, too!”
—Dawn Dais, author of The Sh!t No One Tells You
“Hilarious, poignant, and oh-so-real, this is THE book for anyone of a certain age who wonders what the heck just happened to me.”
—Zibby Owens, national bestselling author of Blank and owner of Zibby’s Bookshop
"In Adulting for Amateurs, Jess Gutierrez has gifted old-ass millennials with a collection of laugh-out-loud essays clowning our shared cultural touchstones. Packed with early 2000's-nostalgia, wild escapades, and delightful dirty jokes (with a few hard-won pearls of wisdom sprinkled on top), Adulting for Amateurs is a hilarious time capsule of the way we were—filtered through Jess's insane (complimentary) comedic voice."
—Caitlin Kunkel, co-author of Inside Jokes and New Erotica for Feminists
“Gutierrez reminds us that growing up isn’t easy. And that unfortunately it’s also not avoidable.”
—Felipe Torres Medina, writer for The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
“Gutierrez delves into her experience as a queer, middle-aged mother who strongly identifies with her generational demographic—elder millennial—and comes back with comic gold.”
—Kirkus
“With self-deprecating humor, Gutierrez, who was born in 1984, unpacks the bewildering experience of becoming the adult in the room regardless of feeling mature enough for the job... Wincingly relatable.”
—Publishers Weekly
—Busy Philipps, New York Times bestselling author of This Will Only Hurt a Little
“Full of nostalgic anecdotes and all-too-relatable stories, Jess reassures us that it’s okay if we have no idea what we’re doing. With humor and heart, Adulting for Amateurs is the perfect guide to prove that growing older doesn’t mean growing up. I needed this book, and you do, too!”
—Dawn Dais, author of The Sh!t No One Tells You
“Hilarious, poignant, and oh-so-real, this is THE book for anyone of a certain age who wonders what the heck just happened to me.”
—Zibby Owens, national bestselling author of Blank and owner of Zibby’s Bookshop
"In Adulting for Amateurs, Jess Gutierrez has gifted old-ass millennials with a collection of laugh-out-loud essays clowning our shared cultural touchstones. Packed with early 2000's-nostalgia, wild escapades, and delightful dirty jokes (with a few hard-won pearls of wisdom sprinkled on top), Adulting for Amateurs is a hilarious time capsule of the way we were—filtered through Jess's insane (complimentary) comedic voice."
—Caitlin Kunkel, co-author of Inside Jokes and New Erotica for Feminists
“Gutierrez reminds us that growing up isn’t easy. And that unfortunately it’s also not avoidable.”
—Felipe Torres Medina, writer for The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
“Gutierrez delves into her experience as a queer, middle-aged mother who strongly identifies with her generational demographic—elder millennial—and comes back with comic gold.”
—Kirkus
“With self-deprecating humor, Gutierrez, who was born in 1984, unpacks the bewildering experience of becoming the adult in the room regardless of feeling mature enough for the job... Wincingly relatable.”
—Publishers Weekly
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