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Fashionably Dead Audiobook

Fashionably Dead

Regular Price:£19.79
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Publisher's Summary

Vampyres don't exist. They absolutely do not exist. At least I didn't think they did 'til I tried to quit smoking and ended up Undead. Who in the hell did I screw over in a former life that my getting healthy equates with dead? Now I'm a Vampyre. Yes, we exist whether we want to or not. However, I have to admit, the perks aren't bad. My girls no longer jiggle, my ass is higher than a kite, and the latest Prada keeps finding its way to my wardrobe. On the downside, I'm stuck with an obscenely profane Guardian Angel who looks like Oprah and a Fairy Fighting Coach who's teaching me to annihilate like the Terminator. To complicate matters, my libido has increased to Vampyric proportions, and my attraction to a hotter-than-Satan's-underpants killer rogue Vampyre is not only dangerous...it's possibly deadly. For real dead.

Permanent death isn't on my agenda. Avoiding him is my only option. Of course, since he thinks I'm his, it's easier said than done. Like that's not enough to deal with, all the other Vampyres think I'm some sort of Chosen One. Holy hell, if I'm in charge of saving an entire race of blood suckers, the Undead are in for one hell of a ride.

©2014 Robyn Peterman (P)2016 Audible, Inc.

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.2 (27 )
5 star
 (15)
4 star
 (6)
3 star
 (3)
2 star
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1 star
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Overall
4.2 (27 )
5 star
 (15)
4 star
 (6)
3 star
 (3)
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 (2)
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Story
4.4 (27 )
5 star
 (15)
4 star
 (9)
3 star
 (1)
2 star
 (2)
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Performance
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  •  
    Sammy staffordshire 02/10/2016
    Sammy staffordshire 02/10/2016

    sam

    ratings
    REVIEWS
    2
    2
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "brilliant laugh out loud book."

    brilliant laugh out loud book. really made me chuckle. easy and fun to follow. looking forward to the next

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    oliver 25/04/2016
    oliver 25/04/2016 Member Since 2016
    HELPFUL VOTES
    1
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    33
    5
    FOLLOWERS
    FOLLOWING
    0
    0
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    Performance
    Story
    "Hated the first 2 hours but then could not stop"

    Stared book and hated it but then I became invested in the story line and could not put it down

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Mrs. S. B. Potter UK 27/03/2016
    Mrs. S. B. Potter UK 27/03/2016 Member Since 2015

    A middle aged woman who hates running & uses audio books to drown out her mind screaming for mercy.

    HELPFUL VOTES
    38
    ratings
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    64
    53
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    FOLLOWING
    9
    0
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Car Crash literature"
    What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?

    A good story with great characters but ruined by awful dialog. Written by a 12 year old is my best guess. Nobody ....screams about being a Prada Whore every 4th page. I think the writer was trying to make it fun & zany but failed. If you take out the lazy writing ...lots of recycled dialog....I admit that minding blowing orgasms would rob your ablity to think but this girl 'sees Jesus' every other time!.....the story would be great. Some interesting concepts, some good relationships but totally & utterly ruined by stupid conversations.


    Has Fashionably Dead put you off other books in this genre?

    This is a book that probably translates better on a written page than in an audio book. My advice ....stick to the book.


    What three words best describe Jessica Almasy’s voice?

    A valiant attempt but really the baby voices were just awful


    Any additional comments?

    I called this car crash literature because it has the same effects. It sucks you in & then you have to listen to the end & even worse you then buy the next in the series. It isn't a bad story but the editor needs slapping for not sorting out the lazy recyling of dialog & the stupidity of the conversations. If you are a fan of good fantasy : Jeaniene Frost, Molly Harper , Karen Chance do NOT read this as it will sadly disappoint. If you are bored, have lots of disposable income & are stuck in hospital.....there is worse.

    1 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Grandma Julie Wigan, United Kingdom 07/03/2016
    Grandma Julie Wigan, United Kingdom 07/03/2016 Member Since 2015
    HELPFUL VOTES
    2
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    80
    12
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    0
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    "I really enjoyed this book it was funny,"

    it was pure escapism, lots of lovable characters including the 4 little demons. I hope the story goes on in another book.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
Sort by:
  • Cheri
    Waverly Hall, Ga.
    16/02/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Ridiculously Funny!"

    This was a ridiculously funny story, with so many parodies, like the foul mouth Angel named Ophra, a vampire named Paris Hilton, a fairy who acted like the Terminator but had questionable fashion sense, and other well know characters.

    After Astrid is turned into a vampire, she receives training from her "guardian" angel and the bu-- kicking fairy and with all this divine intervention, she soon becomes one of the most powerful vampires. But when she meets Ethan, WOW the sparks fly! He was hot, sexy, charming and the attractions between them was instant and steamy.

    I had fun listening to this story, it reminded of a good parody movie and had me laughing out loud. The attraction between Ethan and Astrid was steamy but funny as well.

    Jessica Almasy performance was awesome and I thought she did a great job portraying Astrid's personality. Each character had their own voice, and she used the right amount of inflection throughout the story. Astrid and Ethan were my favorite characters.

    The story does end on a cliffhanger but I didn't mind because I had already planned on getting book 2.

    10 of 11 people found this review helpful
  • AudibleAddiction
    Simi Valley, CA
    15/03/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Hilarious Vampire tale"

    I first heard about Robyn Peterman’s books from a recommendation on Molly Harper’s facebook page. Robyn’s work sounded like something I would enjoy but she didn’t have any books available in Audio format. Until now!

    Astrid is a chain smoking, Prada loving, 20 something year old woman who teaches art classes at the senior center. After her beloved nana dies she makes a bet with her bestie that she can quit smoking. She feels like she’s tried everything and it isn’t working so she decides to see if hypnotism will work. Without spoiling the details of how it happens, she wakes up as a vampire. Astrid has a quirky guardian angel who has a bad potty mouth, a fairy who trains her how to fight and a best friend that sticks with her through anything and isn’t freaked out by all the supernatural beings that show up.

    After meeting other vampires that Astrid likes, she decides to join them and pledge allegiance to their vampire prince. While waiting for the ceremony to start, she runs in to a vampire that she distrusts but has serious attraction to.

    When I started this book, I really didn’t think I was going to like it. For some reason, it didn’t grab my attention in the very beginning, I think it was all of the mention of smoking and the Prada, but it didn’t take long for me to be completely hooked. This is a funny story with a lot of entertaining characters and there are plenty of laugh out loud moments. I love the chemistry between Ethan and Astrid. Even before finishing the book, I knew I’d read the next book.

    There is an event at the end of the book that is an opening for the next book, but it doesn’t feel like a typical cliff hanger to me. It doesn’t leave you disappointed or frustrated, just curious about what comes next.

    7 of 8 people found this review helpful
  • Snoopyvet (Karen)
    United States
    22/02/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Amazeballs"
    What did you love best about Fashionably Dead?

    If you enjoy audio books and snarky love stories with tons a paranormoral this is one you dont' want to miss


    What did you like best about this story?

    How so many funny elements are in the story along with a good story


    What does Jessica Almasy bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?

    She does an amazing job with all the different people. Loved how she did the voices and brought them to life or (dead lol)


    Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

    yes it was I hated when I had to stop listening


    Any additional comments?

    Adore this series knew it would be awesome in audio

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • Laura Collins
    SC, United States
    08/04/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Very Funny!!"
    Any additional comments?

    This is such a fun book; this is the first book in the Fashionably Dead series written by Robyn Peterman and narrated by Jessica Almasy. Once I started listening to it I didn’t want to put it down until the end. This book is great, it is laugh out loud funny. I woke my husband up because I was laughing. We meet Astrid at her grandmother’s funeral, after the funeral she decides she wants to quit smoking, so she meets someone that will hypnotize her to help her stop smoking, or so she thinks. She wakes up and she is not breathing, and then realizes that she is now a vampire. She ends up meeting a fairy, a foul mouthed angel, and ends up joining a group of Prada wearing vampires, how can Astrid go wrong with all the Prada that she could ever possible want.

    The narrator Jessica Almasy did a great job with this book. She did a great job with the different voices of each character in this book. It was very easy to listen to in one sitting and I didn’t want to stop listening until the end.

    If you are looking for a great book with great characters then you need to listen to this book. I am looking forward to listening to the next book by this author and narrator.

    A Review copy was provided to me in exchange for a fair and honest review. The free book held no determination on my personal review.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  • Terri
    United States
    21/02/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Paranormal humor and romanc too..."

    This book is a paranormal romance, but it is also filled with humor from beginning to end and plenty of hot steamy sex to go with it..With characters such as Brad Pitt,Angelina Jolie and Oprah (not the real people, but same names), this book keeps us laughing while exploring the world of the undead, Vampires vs demons, this book is highly entertaining and addictive, Most importantly, it is fun! I loved the little baby monsters, that called Astrid mommy. The author, Robyn Peterman hit a home run on this book. The narrator, Jessica Almasy did a fantastic job on the delivery of this story, Her voices are unique and explosive. I loved the voice and behavior of the character Pam! I look forward to book 2! Well done.

    I received this audio book as a gift so I could read / listen to it and leave a honest and unbiased review,

    5 of 6 people found this review helpful
  • erobbins33
    18/02/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Hilarious!"

    I listened to this and laughed out loud! Funny, sweet, and sexy, Astrid and Gemmas antics are the stuff that legends are made of! Add Pam and The Kev, and it's over the top! The narrator did a tremendous job, especially with the different character voices, making them instantly recognizable. I would definitely recommend it.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  • Jaxie71
    Hawaii
    01/03/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "IT'S BUTTCRACKING HILARIOUS!!!"

    I swear, you're gonna pee in your pants from laughter! Who'd of thought of a foul mouthed Guardian Angel that looks like Oprah that'll make you blush beet red? Or the Terminating faerie that wears tiny speedos? Robyn Peterman that's who.

    From beginning to end you'll laugh out loud. I couldn't put it down! Well developed characters and the plot line is deliciously clever. I loved every scrumptious bit of it. In fact, I devoured it and can't wait to start the next.

    Jessica Almasy's risible interpretation of characters is resplendently hilarious! Especially, our Prada lovin', wise cracking, a** whooping adorable vamp, Astrid. Her rich and colorful voice transcends your imagination.

    I highly recommend this audiobook. It's hot, steamy, mouth wateringly delicious that's the perfect appetizer. I'm sure, the best is yet to come. I can't wait! ( Literally, I can't. I just purchased the next book, Fashionably Dead Down Under. Yay!)

    4 of 5 people found this review helpful
  • Joanne
    Scottsdale, AZ, United States
    27/07/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "What a fun ride!"

    Robyn Peterman's book is a cross between Jim Butcher's Harry Dresden, Maryjanice Davidson's Queen Betsy books (the early ones, before they got dark), and Charlaine Harris's Sookie Stackhouse books (not True Blood which had little humor in them compared to the books). Throw in Rick Gualtieri's foul mouthed Tome Of Bill and you have a fast-paced, totally engrossing, delightful paranormal romance/adventure. Toss in a ton of steamy sex and fascinating characters and you have a beach read that will make you forget to go to work! Narrator Jessica Almasy is perfection, enhancing this already engaging book. Loved it!

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  • Holly Greer
    22/06/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Awesome!!!"

    Robyn Peterman is amazing. The performance was superb. It is great hearing her books come alive!

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  • debbie kaup
    20/06/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Great listen"

    This book is serious funny and sad all rolled into one . Can't wait to start the next book👏

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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