Fetish Baby
A Memoir
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Fetish Baby
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Ashly Burch
Ashly Burch was not shocked when her parents announced their divorce. Mom—an anxious, intensely-motivated immigrant from Thailand—and Dad—a goofy, white Arizonan firmly planted in front of the television—had been drifting apart for some time. But once their marriage ended, something happened that would change everything Ashly thought she knew about her childhood, her family, and her own identity—her father immediately and openly began a search for a new, young, Asian bride.
In Fetish Baby, Ashly unpacks what it means to be the mixed-race daughter of a man with an acknowledged Asian fetish. With equal parts curiosity and irreverence, she reckons with the impact his “preference” has had on her sense of self, delving into the origins of Asian fetishization and the history of the West’s meddling in Thailand, investigating the inner workings of the marriage migration industry, and speaking with friends who have found themselves racially objectified in their relationships. At the same time, she realizes that understanding her father’s unsettling proclivities is only half the battle. She must also face her own lack of connection to her Thai roots, a result of growing up in a household where cultural heritage was never discussed and visiting Thailand was out of the question. And so, hoping that in her mother’s homeland she might also find a place for herself, Ashly convinces her mom to finally travel with her to Bangkok, confronting head on the reality of her mother’s life there and the reasons she left it all behind.
Heartfelt and hilarious, Fetish Baby is ultimately a deeply relatable story about roots, family, and belonging, one that raises uncomfortable questions about race, desire, and the things we wish we didn’t know about our parents.
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