Showing results by narrator "Stig Wemyss" in All Categories

Is this the right book for you? Take the annoying test and find out. Do you ask 'Are we there yet?' over and over on long car trips? Do you like to drive people mad by copying everything they say and do? Do you hog the shower and use up all the hot water? Do you enjoy asking silly questions that have no real answers? Do you swing on the clothesline whenever you get the chance?

Andy and Danny boldly go where sensible people fear to tread. Just how stupid can two human beings be? Just Stupid! provides the answer to this vexing and important question. Winner of AudioFile's Earphones Award - 2005.

This is a very funny book about running, jumping, throwing, winning, losing, cheating, chasing, biting and really hard squeezing.

Is this the right book for you? Take the Crazy Test and find out. Do you bounce so high on your bed that you hit your head on the ceiling? Do you ever look in the mirror and see a crazy maniac staring back at you? Do you like to read stories about kittens, puppies and ponies getting mashed and pulverised? Do you sometimes get the urge to take your clothes off and cover yourself in mud? Do you often waste your time on tests like this one?

Take the disgusting quiz and find out if this is the right audiobook for you!

Do you do any or all of the following: pick your nose, talk in burps, or wee in swimming pools? Do you ever wear the same undies two (or more) days in a row? Do you wish you knew the most disgusting thing in the world? Do you think brussel sprouts are a delicious mouth watering treat? Do you like stories about dead flies, giant slugs, and mysterious brown blobs?

Ever tried to get out of going to school by pretending that you're dead? Ever managed to convince a friend that they're invisible? Ever been stuck in a gorilla suit and nearly put in a zoo? Andy has. Andy's the greatest practical joker in the world ... well, almost. He would be, if only his practical jokes didn't have the annoying habit of backfiring on him.

The Robot Riot! Test: (1.) Henry McThrottle suspects that the new girl, Roberta Flywheel, is A: a spy. B: a boy. C: a robot. (2.) Roberta writes in her diary that she is on a mission to A: kiss Henry. B: clean up the school. C: exterminate all humans. (3.) Henry and his friends get Grant Gadget to build A: a treehouse. B: a sand castle. C: a robot-fighting robot. (4.) Grant Gadget's robot-fighting robot malfunctions and A: picks flowers. B: starts telling jokes. C: goes completely out of control.

On a trip to Principal Greenbeard's office, Henry McThrottle discovers that there is buried treasure on Skull Island, which is somewhere in the school! Henry and his friends Jenny, Gretel, Newton and Jack set out to find a chest filled with gold, jewel-encrusted goblets and pieces of eight (whatever they are). But soon their secret is out, and everyone has treasure fever. Can they find the buried treasure, beat the bully, catch the villain and save their teacher, Mr Brainfright?

"Mr Brainfright is a teacher at Northwest Southeast Central School. He teaches Grade Five and in his class is a student called Henry McThrottle who likes telling stories. That's me. I'm Henry McThrottle and this is my latest story. It's about an evil pencil, a runaway lion, an avalanche and falling out of windows. I hope you like it."

Stare if you dare, into Paul Jennings' wild world. What happens when you grow younger?

"This is unbelievable. This is unreal. What is going on here? First I get a toilet seat stuck around my face and now this little parrot is following me around."

Unseen events like... the dead coming back to life...

Stare, if you dare, into Paul Jennings' wild world. Nine stories that you would never dream of. From one of Australia's most popular authors.

Three hilarious stories in one great volume about a naughty, greedy little fish who nearly gets what he deserves.

On 4 June 1629, the Dutch vessel Batavia struck uncharted rocks off the Western Australian coast. By the time help arrived, over 120 men, women and children had met their deaths - not in the sea but murdered by two fellow survivors, Wouter Loos and Jan Pelgrom. In 1986 teenager Steven Messenger discovers gruesome relics from that wreck. Four months later he disappears without trace. Where is Messenger? Is his disappearance linked to the relics? Someone knows...somewhere....

Arto has a problem. For one, he's a robot. He’s awoken with no memory of who he is, with nothing but a mysterious letter, in a world bereft of those fleshy, talky things that made him. So why is he alone, and where have all the people gone? He stumbles upon a lost, cheeky kitten and selects it as his best friend for the adventure of a lifetime, trying to make sense of all this existence stuff. Just as Arto begins to fear he's the only sentient thing left on the whole planet, a cantankerous robot falls from the sky. She says she's his sister.

Frankie Parsons is twelve going on old man, an apparently sensible, talented boy with a drumbeat of worrying questions steadily gaining volume in his head: Are the smoke alarm batteries flat? Does the cat, and therefore the rest of the family, have worms? Will bird flu strike and ruin life as we know it? Is the Kidney-shaped spot on his chest actually a galloping cancer?

Where did Bogasauruses live? How many cheeks did a Tricerabutt have? Find the answers to these and many other questions in this guide to prehistoric bumosaur life. Covering Pre-crappian time through to the post Crapaceous period, this essential reference will thrill, amaze and inform the whole family. Never again will you look like a fool when somebody asks: 'What bumosaur is that?"

Following a year of record numbers of shark attacks, Sharks Never Sleep takes us around the world to meet shark-attack survivors, shark lovers and shark hunters, who tell us of the primal fear of being eaten alive by a wild animal, the unimaginable grief of losing a loved one and extraordinary stories of encounters with sharks.

Timmy is rude. He's lazy. He's always cranky. And he's also one of the most famous ponies in all the known world! Until one day when ... Poo happens. Surely one little poo of excitement can’t ruin Timmy’s life. Can it? Yes, it can.

It's unbearable... The bird's perch is swinging to and fro and hitting me on the nose. I can see my eye in its little mirror. Unbearably weird... You have the foulest feet ever. There are flies for lunch. A goat swallows your opal. And you have lived before.