Throne of Glass

The World's Most Powerful Assassin is a Sap.

So you've been put into a death camp prison mine at age 17. No one survives this death camp prison. You were there for 2 years. And you're the world's most powerful assassin; the queen of the underworld. And you've seen your people bled to death and you're full of rage and the milk of revenge.

So of course, when you're freed, the first thing you're going to do is become a total airhead and totally like fall in love with two guys because OMG one is like a total Prince, but the other one is like soooo loyal and stalwart. And of course, you will totally eat lots of amazing chocolates that will be listed out individually, because chocolate is like sooo delicious, right?

Don't get me wrong. I've been known to enjoy some full on romance fantasy adventures. I've read and enjoyed Sharon Shinn's Twelve Houses series, and one of those books, the one with Justin and the Lirren girl with the starry hair? That shit was as cheesy and romantic as it gets.

I've even read the first of 4521 trilogies in Jacqueline Carey's Kushiel Cycle. So don't think that I'm all EWWW, because of the elements of romance that this novel trots out. I'm not all EWWW, I'm all PLEEEEEEZE, because it just doesn't make any sense How are you going to be the world's most powerful assassin and the queen of the underworld and be a total napkin as well?

Anyway. That's what you get.

687 of 791 people found this review helpful

✫✫ 4 Stars ✫✫

I had no idea going into this book what is was about and I'll be honest Fantasy really isn't my genre of choice but this was for a book club discussion. With that said, I really enjoyed this book. The world building was great and didn't at any point start to feel like it was too much. The main character is a serious badass with nothing to lose, seriously she is an assassin! I loved her personality and her sarcasm. The two main male characters are very powerful and both have a softer side and plans.

This book had it all!! A harsh competition among a group of criminals, magic, another realm, beasts, a really gripping story, a seriously tough sarcastic women and two powerful men on her side! This was so much more than I expected and I'm so glad I listened to it. I will be continuing with the series!! I need to know what happens next. Oh and the best thing... No Cliffhanger! I described it to someone as a New Adult version of the Hunger games with a little YA Game of Thrones thrown in ;)

The narration was perfect for this book, the heroine is 18 and the narrator has a young voice. She became Celaena immediately for me and not a narrator reading the book to me

32 of 38 people found this review helpful

Awful

I made it to the final two hours of this audiobook during a car trip before I snapped and "skimmed" through the ending. In hindsight, I wish I had listened to reviewer Fil, who accurately describes Celaena as a sap. I honestly can't think of anyone to recommend this book to.

Part of the problem lies in the author's attempt to combine several genres: an action-packed, bloody mystery-adventure-fantasy novel with a solid dose of romantic sexual tension sounds like a great read, doesn't it? And it might have been, had Maas developed any of these ideas thoroughly. Instead, she briefly attempts to develop the "assassin" backstory only moments before plunging into the "romantic" aspect or the thrilling adventure, etc. in a way that is scattered and bizarre. Her prose is uninspired and long-winded. Her characters have illogical reactions considering their roles in life and the story. (Example: a Captain of the Guard for the bloodiest, most ruthless ruler in the known world that stares in guilty horror at his hands after slaying a criminal that was about to murder the woman he's secretly in love with. Yeeeeeeeeah, riiiiiiight …… <--- *Disgusted disbelief.*)

On top of this illogical character development and sloppy writing, Celaena just sucks as a person. She's bratty and egotistical without any backstory or inner monologues to flesh her out. Why is Celaena so famous? Who has she assassinated? Why is she so feared? What makes her think she's better than everyone else? What's her damage? Has she ever had a meaningful conversation with anyone ... ever?

Don't expect answers to these questions by the end of this glacially paced book. This is a shallow story about a girl that is miraculously gifted in all physical skills, a point that is driven home in the way that she bounces back to full health after a year-long stay in a cozy death camp--her world's equivalence to Auschwitz. I'm sorry, but how many Jewish survivors did you hear about that were running in the Olympics only a few weeks after their release? Maas CAN'T have ever trained for any physical competition in her life because she seems to think a few mentions of Celaena puking after a long run are sufficient to give credence to her recovery in about a dozen combat and survival skills. After only a couple of weeks, she can scuttle up smooth, flat walls like a gecko, overpower men three times her body weight, and shoot the hairs off a fly's back from three football fields away (with a bow and arrow)! Her beauty, wit, and charm enchant all and her gallant, noble actions earn her the respect of everyone she meets--save the black-hearted King and his evil pawns! (I think the author also forgot to mention that she poops solid gold and walks on water, too. Maybe she's waiting to reveal that in book 2.)

Authors of old pulp fiction/dime novels like Anthony Hope (Prisoner of Zenda) or Edgar Rice Burroughs (Tarzan, John Carter) could have pulled off such ridiculously gifted characters in an absurd, rip-roaring adventure. Maas does not have this talent. The story is slow and takes thirty minutes to describe a chess or billiards game between Celaena and the Prince, which they play while they discuss … absolutely nothing. I've felt more sexual tension between my grandmother and a cashier at the local pharmacy where she buys hemorrhoid cream. The author spends more time describing the clothing in the scenes than any perceived or observed emotions/reactions/facial expressions. The prince and the Captain are as interesting as cardboard cut-outs, and the "mysterious" killer of the competitors takes all of one second for the listener to identify.

All in all, this really was just an absurd, boring story with terrible world-building and an even more terrible plot. Save your money/credit/time, and skip it!

116 of 140 people found this review helpful

Cheap romance novel

Absolute garbage, this book is about a young woman who just got out of at least a year in prison with hard labor and immediately gets the hots for her captors - a prince and a captain who we keep hearing are real hotties in their tight pants and eyes of "rich, melted brown" (what the heck is melted brown anyway).

The whole time the lead characters are throwing temper tantrums and insulting each other, the bad guys are all scarred and ugly, the mean girls are all pretty and - well - mean, and on and on it goes. I can only listen to a little bit at a time because it's one of the most tiresome audiobooks I've ever come across. If you're in a good mood when you hit play, you won't be 5 minutes later.

So far I'm on chapter 11 and still there has been zero action, just a narrator in the voice of the "heroine" spitting out airheaded comments like descriptions of dresses, insults to people and empty threats. I suspect I won't make it much further, but am still hoping that once the fighting begins the characters will improve, but suspect they won't. I suspect the author knows nothing about fighting and will continue to focus on dresses and appearances.

24 of 29 people found this review helpful

Save the credit!

This book wasn’t for you, but who do you think might enjoy it more?

Maybe an angst-ridden pre-teen would find all the drama and whining more acceptable.

What do you think your next listen will be?

Anything else.

Who would you have cast as narrator instead of Elizabeth Evans?

Although all the characters constantly sounded arrogant and bratty, I don't think the narrator can be held solely responsible; the author's writing is just as much to blame.

What character would you cut from Throne of Glass?

All of them! The "world's best assassin" "wrings her hands in worry" and lets people sneak up on her on a regular basis. She spent her career carefully hiding her identity, yet now constantly whines that no one respects her or takes her seriously because they don't know who she is. The "spoiled prince" is an arrogant womanizing jerk, who refuses to marry because every woman he's ever met is "mentally inferior". Listening to them is like listening to a bunch of immature 12-year-old spoiled rotten brats.

Any additional comments?

Save the credit!!

110 of 138 people found this review helpful

Main hero is Mary Sue

I was looking for a book from a perspective of "not-so-good-guy" and having an assassin as main protagonist seemed like a neat idea. I was somewhat disappointed - I have listened to 2/3 of the book and decided that this is not for me. The main flaw is that this seems to be a truly young adult book (main heroes are in twenties, torn between multiple romantic interests) which on its own would not be too bad, however the main heroine is an entitled brat (at least from her inner monologue, at least she's not acting too stupid) and the worst of all - a "Mary Sue". She's nearly perfect, almost everyone instantly likes her and she pretty much faces no (real) challenges. Do not recommend.

18 of 22 people found this review helpful

Good story, poor presentation

I liked the story, but not the narration. Many times it was so annoying that I considered stopping listening and reading instead.

35 of 44 people found this review helpful

It's no Game of Thrones...

Any additional comments?

I have never felt compelled to write a review before, but I want to save you from a mistake. This book has a splash on the cover that says "Fans of Game of Thrones and Hunger Games will love this!" I think George R.R. Martin is a genius and his books have cost me numerous nights of sleep. And who doesn't love Katniss? So if this book had a strong sassy no bs female lead in a world similar to GOT this could be worth a read? No.The lead character can wield a weapon, though the fight specifics are often lacking. "She knocked him out." "She hit the target dead center." Her emotional development is young. She's vain and annoying. Maybe she will grow up as the series plays out, but I won't be along for the ride to find out.Though Katniss and Celaena would be fighting on the same side I think Katniss would be doing a lot of eye rolling in having to deal with Celaena. The male characters are a bit more interesting. If you are a hard core GOT fan you will be bored silly. This book has nowhere the depth, plot nor characters to hold your attention. Hunger Games is a more fair comparison and while some of the story is similar (strong female lead out to thwart an unfair society) the comparisons end there.I probably would have liked this book when I was in high school. If you are a grown up look elsewhere...

PS I would not have bothered to write this review had the publisher not tried to hoodwink GOT and HG fans...

89 of 113 people found this review helpful

Wanted to like it

I thought the story would have been a little more intense during the fight scenes. Also, I couldn't distinguish the different characters. I may have liked it better with a different narrator.

13 of 16 people found this review helpful

Ok but......

I gave it a chance but an assassin that doesn't kill isn't much of an assassin. She boast of being an assassin but even in the preview for the next book, she's not really killing anyone she's just making it seem like she is, which is kinda boring to me!

27 of 34 people found this review helpful