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Don't Touch the Blue Stuff! Audiobook

Don't Touch the Blue Stuff!: Where the Hell is Tesla?, Book 2

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Publisher's Summary

Something called the “Blue Juice" is coming. For all of us. 

Luckily, me (Chip Collins), Pete, Nikola Tesla, Bobo, and FBI Agent Gina Phillips are here to kick its ass, and send it back to last Tuesday. Maybe. Or maybe we'll fail, and everyone in the multiverse is doomed. (Seriously, you might want to get that underground bunker ready.) Either way, I've got to get home to Julie and find out – woah, I'm not about to tell you that right here in the book description! TMI, dude. 

WARNING: If you haven't heard Where the Hell is Tesla?, I apologize in advance, as you might get completely freaking lost. If you do, just call my apartment, I'm usually around, and I'll fill you in. (If I'm not stuck in the ITA.) – Chip 

©2017 Rob Dircks (P)2017 Rob Dircks

What the Critics Say

"An amusing and unexpectedly crazy ride - a perfect and hilarious follow-up to Where the Hell is Tesla?” (AudiobookReviewer.com)

"So damn funny and insanely entertaining! Loved the first one and this was just as fun.” (Dan Bova, Entrepreneur.com )

"Chip’s at it again! He was very fun in Where the Hell Is Tesla? and he’s just as fun in this book. And Dircks continues to impress me with his narrating abilities.” (Dab of Darkness Reviews)

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

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  • CodySydney
    Sydney, Australia
    18/11/17
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "COMPLETE JIBBERISH. COMPLETELY LOVED IT. "

    ALL IN CAPS FOR A REASON. SILLY BUT ROMANTIC, YOUTHFUL BUT NOSTALGIC, TOTALLY FUN AND I WANT MOAR KTHXBAI

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • Chuck V
    02/11/17
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    Performance
    Story
    "The Bee's Knee's!"

    Great sequel to a creative and enjoyable story. I didn't want it ro end. Looking forward to more frim Mr. Dircks!

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • Julie W. Capell
    Valparaiso, Chile
    30/10/17
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Another home run for Dircks"

    Another home run for Rob Dircks, an author with no shortage of ideas and whose new work I now await with great anticipation. This sequel to "Where the Hell is Tesla?" did not disappoint. This book was full of the same irreverent humor and scifi references I have come to expect from Dircks and that remind me so strongly of John Scalzi's writing. But what makes this book stand above most scifi is the way it incorporates a very touching tale of the meaning of fatherhood, friendship and love.

    Also kudos to Dircks for reading his own work, he does an absolutely fantastic job with all the accents of the various characters and even does the female characters extremely well.

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • Jerome Mayne
    Minneapolis, MN USA
    25/10/17
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    Story
    "Rob Dirks does it again!"

    The anticipation I felt while waiting for this second book in the series was excruciating. It was well worth the wait. The adventures of his main characters kept me riveted just like the journey these guys took in his first book -- Where the Hell is Tesla.

    Great story teller.

    I highly recommend both books.

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • Kevin Spudic
    Montana
    08/10/17
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    "Super Sequel!"

    A great follow on story. Dirks' narration is the best and makes the story come alive. I laughed out loud on several occasions.

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • DabOfDarkness
    Ojo Caliente, NM, United States
    06/10/17
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    "Such a fun romp with Tesla & Einstein!"

    Note: Even though this is Book 2 in the series, it works fine as a stand alone.

    Chip’s at it again! He was very fun in Where the Hell Is Tesla? and he’s just as fun in this book. The humor has carried over well even as the author added in a little seriousness. Pete has gone missing and Julie has big news for Chip that he hears just before being swept off by the FBI to assist in this latest problem with the inter-dimensions.

    Agent Gina Phillips gives Chip a much needed hand throughout this adventure. She’s sometimes brutal but sometimes laughing (at Chip’s expense) and she make a great ally and would be a horrible enemy. Honestly, I am hardpressed to say whether Chip or Gina is my favorite character. Toss in some great minds like Tesla and Einstein and I was a very happy camper.

    Bobo puts in an appearance early on and then again later in the story. He’s a contributing character even though he can only speak in rhymes. Then there’s Pete who has gone missing and the mysterious Blue Juice is suspected to be at fault. Indeed, all the dimensions everywhere may be in danger! Chip and Gina certainly have theirs hands full… at least until they meet a wise cockroach that provides some much needed answers. Yep! If you have any fear of large talking insects, then you may need to mentally gird your loins before launching into this book.

    I loved the insects. That may just be me.

    Everything worked up until the end of the the story… or so I thought. The tale really felt like it was wrapped up but I still had something like 2 hours left on this audiobook. Well, yes, there was a bit more adventure and world saving to be done. Gina needs to save a special person. Chip has to pretend to know it all as President. That was all good but it felt like a Chip short story or side novella that was added to the end of Don’t Touch the Blue Stuff! So, that’s not a bad thing necessarily; it just wasn’t expected.

    All told, I like this book a little more than Where the Hell Is Tesla? because of Gina. She’s a fun character, being so serious much of the time. He ability to be both fed up with Chip and also protect him as ordered created many humorous situations. I think everyone needs a Bobo.

    I received a free copy of this book.

    The Narration: Rob Dircks continues to impress me with his narrating abilities. Once again, all the character voices were distinct and his female voices were believable. I also liked his accents (Serbian, German, Togolese, etc.) and felt they were well done. There were no technical issues with this recording.

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • Adrian
    27/09/17
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    "Silly and fun sci-fi novel. Great sequel!"

    4.5 stars
    Rob Dircks seems to always hit all the right things to make a great novel. Since this is a sequel to a novel that came out a couple of years ago, he perfectly addresses this by adding in a great little review. He doesn’t shy away from “breaking the fourth wall” and addresses the readers directly. I like this approach as it gives a nice personal touch to the book.

    Just like the first book, Where the Hell is Tesla?, this was a fun and silly sci-fi novel that explores alternate dimensions with famous former scientists (Tesla and Einstein) that form a rag-tag team to solve/defeat a serious problem.
    Warning: There is a fair amount of profanity in this book. While some may think it is unnecessary, it is partially what makes the character of Chip.

    One thing I keep coming back to is how “personal” this book is. I am not sure how to best explain this. Chip starts to get really serious about his life and future life decisions and the book reflects this tone really well (especially the audio version). It’s not just that though. We really get a good idea of who these characters are with great character-building that makes this a complete novel and a fantastic sequel.

    Audiobook narrator Rob Dircks rating: 4.5 stars
    Rob is great at narrating books. I almost think he could quit his job as a writer and go full-time into the audio-narrator industry! You can tell he takes lots of time and care into making sure the audio production is very well done and the characters are living, breathing beings. His accents/voices for Tesla AND Einstein were terrific!

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • Sunny Webb
    Buda, TX United States
    28/12/17
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    "What a fun ride!"

    Wow! The first book in this sci-fi series was incredible, but the sequel has somehow surpassed it.

    Usually, when a book is read by the author it makes me cringe. Absolutely not the case here. Rob Dircks not only wrote one of the most entertaining, genuinely emotional but perfectly tongue-in-cheek book series ever, but he also has become one of my favorite narrators of all time! Seriously Rob, if this author thing doesn’t work out, you should still narrate every book I listen to from now on.

    Listeners: If you like Tesla, a fun story with heart, ridiculousness with intelligence, and/or simply having a damn good time, then download this book immediately!

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  • Ryan McGuinness
    22/12/17
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    "Awesome fun."

    I love the mis-adventures of Chip, quite the riot. Overall this is a great story, the use of alternates is a wonderful way to explore the many facets of characters. There are so many possibilities I hope these adventures continue.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  • Tracey
    SCHAUMBURG, ILLINOIS, United States
    15/12/17
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    Performance
    Story
    "Original, witty and fun"

    Characters are great, the story original. Fun and witty. Meeting Tesla and Einstein and of course joyful Bobo. Highly recommend.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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