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Summary

Still struggling from the effects of a narcissistic or psychopathically abusive relationship?

Many people do and sadly, there is very little information available to be found online or in the written research, or with counsellors and therapists that can help. Narcissistic Victim Syndrome is not officially recognised, nor is it widely even known.

Even when it is accepted, recognised, and known not many people seem to know what to do about it to heal it.... The fact is being in a relationship with a narcissistic mother over a long period of time has long lasting traumatic effects that can be extremely catastrophic to the person suffering them.

DO THE FOLLOWING SYMPTOMS SOUND FAMILIAR?

  • Ruined self-confidence
  • Doubting yourself and your sanity
  • Mood swings
  • Sleeplessness
  • Extreme weight loss or weight gain
  • Uncharacteristic jealousy/insecurity
  • Feeling like you don’t know the difference between right and wrong
  • Extreme paranoia (being turned into an obsessive detective)
  • Endless, repetitive obsessive thinking about your mother
  • Constantly trying to find explanations for what has happened
  • Feelings of helplessness and despair
  • A desire to self-isolate
  • Feeling desperately misunderstood
  • Overwhelming feelings of loss and grief
  • Extreme bouts of rage
  • An inability to be comfortable with yourself
  • Strange dreams
  • Sudden inexplicable anxiety followed by rapid dips into depression
  • The list goes on.

“NOBODY UNDERSTANDS!”
I hear this frustrated cry from abused people a lot.

I felt the same way when I was recovering from emotional abuse at the hands of a narcissistic/borderline psychopath. If you try and tell people who have no experience with a narcissist (there is no experience like being with a narcissist, its not their fault they can’t understand) about it, they will either deny your experience, tell you you are exaggerating, or look at you like you were crazy.

“Maybe my mother is right, maybe it really is me.”

WHAT YOU NEED NOW:

Someone who has been through the same experiences you have and understands them from the inside.

Someone who has the knowledge, training, education, and experience working on himself and others to lead you through the emotional s--tstorm that breaking with a narcissistic mother can create.

WHAT YOU WILL LEARN

  • How to recognize your narcissistic mother
  • Signs of a narcissistic mother
  • Treatment for children of narcissistic mothers
  • Things narcissistic mothers say for mental manipulation and control
  • Protection tips
  • How to heal now from abuse!
  • Separating from a narcissistic mother
  • And much more.
©2019 Dr. Theresa J. Covert (P)2019 Dr. Theresa J. Covert

What listeners say about Narcissistic Mothers: The Truth About the Problem with Being the Daughter of a Narcissistic Mother, and How to Fix It

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This book is great.

This book is great. As a mental health professional, I would also recommend this book to those who are dealing with CPTSD as a result of having a narcissistic mother. Before I bought the book, I was concerned because of some of the negative reviews. However, this book is very comprehensive and feel that maybe those who gave the book a negative review may have not wanted to do the hard work.

5 people found this helpful

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It helped me to understand why my mother used me

THIS. BOOK. This book has been so comforting and validating. It helped me to understand why my mother used me as an emotional punching bag my entire life and my dad just went with whatever she wanted no matter how it made me feel. It helped answer "why?" and allowed me to start my healing process. This will be a resource that I go back to over and over as time goes on

2 people found this helpful

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The book is very well explained

I listen this book more than 5 years ago and I am still grateful for the insights it provided into my childhood as well as my adult patterns. This is one of the most impactful books I have ever listen. Rarely have I seen me so clearly in the words of another author. When I finished listenit I recommended it to my sister, but I chose not to send her my copy as I had underlined so many passages in it and did not wish to influence her reaction to it. The book is very well explained and the information is very well thought out. More recently I've come to appreciate the author's courage in writing this while navigating relations with her mother and sharing about that as well.

2 people found this helpful

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The book is to help you on your healing journey

I knew the book was right for me when I listen to the beginning. The book is to help you on your healing journey, not bash your family of origin. The book comes from a place of compassion. The book covers empirical evidence of the results of narcissistic mothers on their daughters. It gives a variety of clinical examples, as well as ways that you can see where your mother is on the narcism spectrum. It does into detail about some of the symptoms, feelings, and thoughts you may be experiencing as a result of childhood stresses/trauma.

2 people found this helpful

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Unspecific and sloppily written

This book was not as focused as a I would have liked. When describing different kinds of narcissist, it doesn't provide examples of it from narcissistic mothers specifically, but more generally. This leads to the overall impression of this book being a cut and paste job from the authors over books, which all have very similar titles. Likewise, when it discusses leaving the narcissist and why one started a relationship with them in the first place, it does so as a romantic partner rather than a parent. I didn't choose to be anyone's daughter. The overall book is sloppily put together, with incorrect words used e.g. causal instead of casual, giving the impression that the author is just trying to maximise their profits by appealing to every niche of childhood trauma without offering a lot of content to specifically address that. There are some suggestions for recovery, but much of the advice centres around cutting off ones mother, which isn't my preferred choice, so was alienating for me, and I feel failed to bring out the complexities of mother daughter relstionshios where the daughter is taking more of a caring role.

1 person found this helpful

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Adore this book

I've always had problems with self doubt and worthiness and I always knew it had to do with my mother and how she treated me. Over the holidays I realized how incredibly selfish she is. I returned home unable to shake off this realization. I found this book and it's explanation of the narcissistic mother has totally opened my eyes and helped me understand our interactions from childhood till now. It's given me a new perspective, and being armed with this knowledge gives me the tools to become the authentic me as well as recognize destructive relationship behaviors due to growing up with a narcissistic mother - and to change its course when it rears its head.

1 person found this helpful

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Worth it

I was seeing a therapist for other issues in my life and after listening to my history, she recommended this book and suggested that my mother sounded like she was a classic narcissist and that was affecting how I perceived and dealt with the difficulties I experienced in my life.

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loved this really helped me try understand

so right that its sickening to think your own mother woukd behave like this loved

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Great book, really easy to listen

Great book, really easy to listen. If you think your mother was a narcissist then this is worth listening. I now know why I am so insecure as an adult and why I choose the men that I date. I have started therapy since listen this book in order to work through these issues. The book definitely tells you how to work on overcoming growing up with a narcissistic mother, but I wanted somebody to actually help me through it. Worth listen.

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So happy to have found this book.

So happy to have found this book. Really has helped me to heal and forgive. Helped me to improve my relationships with others and be a better mother noticing these qualities in myself being raised by a full-blown narcissist. Examples in the book are sadly more extreme compared to my upbringing which helped me realize I didn't have it so bad and to find gratitude in my situation. Helped me to realize that my mother only became who she was because of her sad upbringing and that I really should have pity for her. Changed my perspective and outlook and also helped me to process my emotions so much better so that I can function more happily in life as a wife and mother.

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  • Angela Terry
  • 18-10-19

A great book to help navigate the world

A great book to help navigate the world many of us are involuntarily brought up in and have to deal with as adults. I finally realized through listening to this book that I AM good enough...but I will never be good enough, do enough, be enough for some people, and that's their problem, not mine. It's very freeing to move past all the "junk" and realize it no longer needs to define me and that I have choices. Recommend to any adult child who has a parent with this sad problem.

2 people found this helpful

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  • Bernard Arreola
  • 17-10-19

This book recommended for all

This book was recommended to me by my husband's father (who was a psychologist) and his step-Mother. Not only is this book a super helpful self-help book but it will help daughters of narcissistic Mothers begin the healing process. If your Mother is a "narcissistic vampire" this book may save your body, mind and/or soul.

2 people found this helpful

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  • Lindsey Bailey
  • 16-06-19

Excellent to read.

Excellent to read. I accomplished a a lot of things what author was suppose to explain about. In my case it is some similar with my life story. i have got so many things to learn. Really happy to read this book. recommended..!

2 people found this helpful

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  • Dragon P
  • 16-06-19

Love this book!!

This is a good book!! This book changed my life, in that it allowed me to finally see the hidden patterns of my narcissistic mother and the damage they caused. It also took me by the hand and showed me a path out of the personal hell that such a relationship creates.

2 people found this helpful

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  • Diana Newsome
  • 17-10-19

Helped me to heal myself

I have listened many times. The third time things clicked; some issues I wasn't able to access earlier became more clear. This book actually took me through step by step and I was finally able to heal some things. Every time I listen, I learned something and/or felt understood. This last time was the most helpful and I felt it might be important to share that with others who are healing from this experience.

1 person found this helpful

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  • Eli W
  • 21-05-21

Good book, narration/production not great

Good book; informative, would recommend the book.

The narrator’s performance is really, really, really, really distracting here; perhaps the narration style would be more appropriate for a children’s picture-book than for this material.

The production is also poor towards the beginning of the book - several sentences were obviously edited into each other in post-production, as words and phrases are heard twice in a row, or a sentence doesn’t make sense because it’s obviously missing several words.

Maybe I’d enjoy the hard copy more than the audiobook - I appreciate the book itself, but I guess I’m not a fan of this audio version

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  • Beca
  • 02-05-21

Not the right tile

The title is deceiving, It spends so much time defining narcissism and the types of narcissist. It doesn’t really speak to what the daughter of a narcissist needs in order to heal.

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  • Sandra R. Merrill
  • 15-08-20

Understanding Narcissistic Abuse

A journey through description and roadmap for recovery. Helps explain a lot. I recommend for children and family of Narcissists.

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  • Suegaboo
  • 16-05-20

1 learned alot about NPD that I never knew before.

It was my first audible book so definitely a different experience. I loved the narrator. I have a hard time comprehending and concentrating, but she kept you interested. Great book!

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  • Anonymous User
  • 31-12-19

Wouldn't recommend

This book pays more attention to narcisisim as a whole rather than the relationship between mothers and daughters. I didn't find it helpful at all.