It's Not Me, It's You cover art

It's Not Me, It's You

Impossible perfectionist, 27, seeks very very very tidy woman

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It's Not Me, It's You

By: Jon Richardson
Narrated by: Jon Richardson
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About this listen

A control freak looks for love (women who leave wet teaspoons in sugar bowls need not apply).

‘I haven’t woken up with a cup of tea by the bed for seven years. It seems such a small thing but it’s one of a thousand things I miss about having someone around to take care of me. I have spent my entire adult life getting things the way I want them and all I want now is someone to give it all up for.’ Jon Richardson

Is your filing faultless? Your CDs, apostrophes, cutlery all in the right places? Can you eat a biscuit in the correct way? Then Jon Richardson (single for seven years and counting) could be your ideal man…

Living alone in a one bedroom flat in Swindon, 27 year old Jon has had far too much time on his hands to think. In fact to obsess. About almost everything. Jon’s obssessive compulsive personality disorder has seen him arrange the coins in his pockets in ascending size and colour code his bookshelves. It takes him less than 90 seconds to locate a receipt for a pair of shoes he bought in 1997. Over to the filing cabinet and R for receipts, S for shoes.

But Jon doesn’t want to be like this, in fact he would quite like to share his life with someone. But who could that someone be? Someone like himself, a quarrelsome perfectionist only with breasts and less body hair? Absolutely not. But who exactly is Jon looking for and where will he find her? Faced with a loveless future filled with his own peculiar quirks and perfectionism, Jon sets about his search for The One. The question is, will he mind her keeping the knives to the left of the forks in the cutlery drawer or organising the CDs by genre and not alphabetically?

©2011 Jon Richardson (P)2011 HarperCollins Publishers Limited
Literature & Fiction Funny Witty Feel-Good Comedy

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Critic reviews

‘Richardson is an OCD-afflicted, grumpy young man who can spin a brilliant routine and could well be the best comic of his generation.’ The Herald

‘Boldly funny and expertly written, it’s a look at dark subjects deftly handled by an engaging comic talent.’ Shortlist

‘Written in his unique style, Jon's quest is a hilarious eye-opener into the mind of a neat freak.’ The Sun

‘I loved Jon’s book. It’s even better than the real thing because you can’t hear his voice.’ Michael McIntyre

‘Jon’s book is just like him. Funny, enjoyable and short.’ Alan Carr

All stars
Most relevant
Although this book was amusing, it's not his usual comedy. You can tell he is reading it from a book and it doesn't sound very natural to listen to. However, it's easy listening. Good for the car as you don't need to concentrate too much. Also very relatable if you have a dark/dry sense of humour or you can find the comedy in an existential crisis!

Easy listening

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loved it was just what I needed to relax and unwind and put a smile on my face

always funny great read

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I loved it! Jon Richardson is a brilliant comic and hearing this read by him made it even brilliant!

Simply Brilliant

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If you are fan of John Richardson you should read the book it was amazing.

Loved it!

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Great book ;I really enjoyed it. Jon narrating it really added to the humour and enjoyment of the book. It finished too quickly though! I wish it was a longer story!

I wish it was longer

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