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Healing Your Emotional Self
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It Wasn't Your Fault
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Shame is one of the most destructive of human emotions. If you suffered childhood physical or sexual abuse, you may experience such intense feelings of shame that it almost seems to define you as a person. In order to begin healing, it's important for you to know that it wasn't your fault. In this gentle guide, therapist and childhood abuse expert Beverly Engel presents a mindfulness and compassion-based therapeutic approach to help you overcome the debilitating shame that keeps you tied to the past.
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Helpful but...
- By kate on 03-07-16
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Healing the Shame That Binds You is the most enduring work of family relationship expert and New York Times best-selling author John Bradshaw. In it, he shows how unhealthy toxic shame, often learned young and maintained into adulthood, is the core component in our compulsions, co-dependencies, addictions and drive to superachieve.
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Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
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In this breakthrough book, clinical psychologist Lindsay Gibson exposes the destructive nature of parents who are emotionally immature or unavailable. You will see how these parents create a sense of neglect and discover ways to heal from the pain and confusion caused by your childhood. By freeing yourself from your parents' emotional immaturity, you can recover your true nature, control how you react to them, and avoid disappointment. Finally, you'll learn how to create positive new relationships so you can build a better life.
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Game changer
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The causes of Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder range from severe neglect to monstrous abuse. Many survivors grew up in houses that were not homes-in families that were as loveless as orphanages and sometimes as dangerous. If you felt unwanted, unliked, rejected, hated, and/or despised for a lengthy portion of your childhood, trauma may be deeply engrained in your mind, soul, and body. This book is a practical guide to recovering from lingering childhood trauma. It is copiously illustrated with examples of the author's and his clients' journeys of recovering.
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Life Changing
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The Emotionally Absent Mother
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Was your mother preoccupied, distant, or even demeaning? Have you struggled with relationships - or with your own self-worth? Often, the grown children of emotionally absent mothers can't quite put a finger on what's missing from their lives. The children of abusive mothers, by contrast, may recognize the abuse - but overlook its lasting, harmful effects. Psychotherapist Jasmin Lee Cori has helped thousands of men and women heal the hidden wounds left by every kind of undermothering.
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Healing Developmental Trauma
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Explaining that an impaired capacity for connection to self and to others underlies most psychological and many physiological problems, clinicians Laurence Heller, PhD, and Aline LaPierre, PsyD, introduce the NeuroAffective Relational Model™ (NARM), a unified approach to developmental, attachment, and shock trauma that emphasizes working in the present moment. NARM is a somatically based psychotherapy that helps bring into awareness the parts of self that are disorganized and dysfunctional.
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Useful and informative, but heavy going at times.
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It Wasn't Your Fault
- Freeing Yourself From the Shame of Childhood Abuse with the Power of Self-Compassion
- By: Beverly Engel
- Narrated by: Kate Rudd
- Length: 8 hrs and 47 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Shame is one of the most destructive of human emotions. If you suffered childhood physical or sexual abuse, you may experience such intense feelings of shame that it almost seems to define you as a person. In order to begin healing, it's important for you to know that it wasn't your fault. In this gentle guide, therapist and childhood abuse expert Beverly Engel presents a mindfulness and compassion-based therapeutic approach to help you overcome the debilitating shame that keeps you tied to the past.
-
-
Helpful but...
- By kate on 03-07-16
-
Healing the Shame That Binds You
- By: John Bradshaw
- Narrated by: John Pruden
- Length: 11 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Healing the Shame That Binds You is the most enduring work of family relationship expert and New York Times best-selling author John Bradshaw. In it, he shows how unhealthy toxic shame, often learned young and maintained into adulthood, is the core component in our compulsions, co-dependencies, addictions and drive to superachieve.
-
-
A Genuinely Enlightening Experience
- By MR J C WESSON on 12-01-17
-
Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
- How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents
- By: Lindsay C. Gibson PsyD
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 6 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In this breakthrough book, clinical psychologist Lindsay Gibson exposes the destructive nature of parents who are emotionally immature or unavailable. You will see how these parents create a sense of neglect and discover ways to heal from the pain and confusion caused by your childhood. By freeing yourself from your parents' emotional immaturity, you can recover your true nature, control how you react to them, and avoid disappointment. Finally, you'll learn how to create positive new relationships so you can build a better life.
-
-
Game changer
- By mark on 29-08-17
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Complex PTSD
- From Surviving to Thriving
- By: Pete Walker
- Narrated by: Paul Brion
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The causes of Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder range from severe neglect to monstrous abuse. Many survivors grew up in houses that were not homes-in families that were as loveless as orphanages and sometimes as dangerous. If you felt unwanted, unliked, rejected, hated, and/or despised for a lengthy portion of your childhood, trauma may be deeply engrained in your mind, soul, and body. This book is a practical guide to recovering from lingering childhood trauma. It is copiously illustrated with examples of the author's and his clients' journeys of recovering.
-
-
Life Changing
- By Penelope Burton on 18-01-19
-
The Emotionally Absent Mother
- How to Recognize and Heal the Invisible Effects of Childhood Emotional Neglect, Second Edition
- By: Jasmin Lee Cori MS LPC
- Narrated by: Emily Durante
- Length: 8 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Was your mother preoccupied, distant, or even demeaning? Have you struggled with relationships - or with your own self-worth? Often, the grown children of emotionally absent mothers can't quite put a finger on what's missing from their lives. The children of abusive mothers, by contrast, may recognize the abuse - but overlook its lasting, harmful effects. Psychotherapist Jasmin Lee Cori has helped thousands of men and women heal the hidden wounds left by every kind of undermothering.
-
Healing Developmental Trauma
- How Early Trauma Affects Self-Regulation, Self-Image, and the Capacity for Relationship
- By: Laurence Heller, Aline Lapierre
- Narrated by: Tom Perkins
- Length: 10 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Explaining that an impaired capacity for connection to self and to others underlies most psychological and many physiological problems, clinicians Laurence Heller, PhD, and Aline LaPierre, PsyD, introduce the NeuroAffective Relational Model™ (NARM), a unified approach to developmental, attachment, and shock trauma that emphasizes working in the present moment. NARM is a somatically based psychotherapy that helps bring into awareness the parts of self that are disorganized and dysfunctional.
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Useful and informative, but heavy going at times.
- By DeCatalyst on 05-11-16
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The Body Never Lies
- The Lingering Effects of Hurtful Parenting
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- Length: 5 hrs and 36 mins
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Never before has world-renowned psychoanalyst Alice Miller examined so persuasively the long-range consequences of childhood abuse on the body. Using the experiences of her patients along with the biographical stories of literary giants such as Virginia Woolf, Franz Kafka, and Marcel Proust, Miller shows how a child's humiliation, impotence, and bottled rage will manifest itself as adult illness - be it cancer, stroke, or other debilitating diseases.
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A good point ruined by misinformation
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Why Do I Do That?
- Psychological Defense Mechanisms and the Hidden Ways They Shape Our Lives
- By: Joseph Burgo PhD
- Narrated by: John Raines
- Length: 7 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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This is a self-help book for people who don't usually buy self-help books. Instead of offering cognitive-behavioral techniques for dealing with anger, or affirming strategies to boost self-esteem, this self-help book adapts the basic methods of psychodynamic psychotherapy to a guided course in self-exploration, highlighting the universal role of defense mechanisms in warding off emotional pain.
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Really open your mind to who you are
- By o. Hodgkinson on 10-05-17
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Home Coming
- Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child
- By: John Bradshaw
- Narrated by: John Bradshaw
- Length: 3 hrs and 28 mins
- Abridged
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Using a combination of workshop presentations and exclusive, practical exercises, accompanied by the soothing music of Steven Halpern, John Bradshaw demonstrates how your wounded inner child may be causing you pain and offers the tools to help you gradually, safely go back to reclaim, and nurture that child - and literally help yourself grow up again. This special presentation will show you how to: validate your inner child through meditations and affirmations; give your child permission to break destructive family roles and rules; adopt new rules allowing pleasure and honest self-exploration; deal with anger and difficult relationships; pay attention to your innermost purpose and desires...and find new joy and energy in living.
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Interesting, but not the book.
- By Laurence on 30-06-11
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Dodging Energy Vampires
- An Empath's Guide to Evading Relationships That Drain You and Restoring Your Health and Power
- By: Christiane Northrup MD
- Narrated by: Christiane Northrup MD
- Length: 6 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Highly sensitive people - or empaths - see life through the eyes of compassion and caring. They were born that way. As a result, they carry a tremendous amount of inner light. But they’re also the favored prey of “vampires” who feed off empaths’ energy and disrupt their lives on every level - physical, emotional, and financial.
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A very empowering book
- By Carolyn Gibson on 05-05-18
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Self-Esteem: Fast Proven Treatment for Recovery from Low Self-Esteem
- By: Jennifer Alison
- Narrated by: Heather Tuya
- Length: 4 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Don't let low self-esteem rule your life - overcome it fast with easy practicable steps. Low self-esteem can affect every area of our lives. It can be a horrible curse to live with, but thankfully one that can be beaten. Dr. Jennifer Alison's Self-Esteem: Fast Proven Treatment for Recovery from Low Self-Esteem is a much-praised international best seller, thanks to its practical and easy-to-implement advice.
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Great audio, listened to time and time again
- By Jays on 09-08-16
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In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts
- Close Encounters with Addiction
- By: Dr Gabor Maté
- Narrated by: Daniel Maté
- Length: 15 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Dr Gabor Maté is one of the world’s most revered thinkers on the psychology of addiction. His radical findings - based on decades of work with patients challenged by catastrophic drug addiction and mental illness - are reframing how we view all human development. In this award-winning modern classic, Gabor Maté takes a holistic and compassionate approach to addiction, whether to alcohol, drugs, sex, money or anything self-destructive. He presents it not as a discrete phenomenon confined to a weak-willed few but as a continuum that runs through (and even underpins) our society.
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Incredibly insightful.
- By Pelle stones on 17-02-19
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It Didn't Start with You
- How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle
- By: Mark Wolynn
- Narrated by: Mark Wolynn
- Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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As a pioneer in the field of inherited family trauma, Mark Wolynn has worked with individuals and groups on a therapeutic level for over 20 years. It Didn't Start with You offers a pragmatic and prescriptive guide to his method, the Core Language Approach. Diagnostic self-inventories provide a way to uncover the fears and anxieties conveyed through everyday words, behaviors, and physical symptoms.
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A book that must be finished before judging
- By Miss B on 18-02-17
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Beyond Codependency
- And Getting Better All the Time
- By: Melody Beattie
- Narrated by: Christina Moore
- Length: 7 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Alcoholism, drug abuse, and similar destructive practices can render families dysfunctional. When the children of these families become adults, they sometimes develop self-defeating survival tactics, such as low self-esteem or an obsession with controlling another person's behavior. To help those stuck in codependent cycles identify and eliminate such troubling issues from their relationships, Beattie shares wisdom gained from years of experience.
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Waking the Tiger
- Healing Trauma
- By: Peter A. Levine, Ann Frederick
- Narrated by: Chris Sorensen
- Length: 8 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Waking the Tiger offers a new and hopeful vision of trauma. It views the human animal as a unique being, endowed with an instinctual capacity. It asks and answers an intriguing question: Why are animals in the wild, though threatened routinely, rarely traumatized? By understanding the dynamics that make wild animals virtually immune to traumatic symptoms, the mystery of human trauma is revealed.
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narration issues
- By mr i mullins on 03-04-17
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Soul Without Shame
- A Guide to Liberating Yourself from the Judge Within
- By: Byron Brown, A.H. Almaas (Foreward)
- Narrated by: Fajer Al-Kaisi
- Length: 11 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Whether we call it the inner critic, superego, or just plain nag, most of us have a "judge within" who's constantly on our case. A comprehensive guide to understanding how the inner critic works, this book offers practical, positive suggestions for breaking free of it. Using straightforward language and examples from everyday life, Byron Brown shows: Where the inner judge came from. How it operates. Why it trips us up. Why we believe we need it. How to develop awareness of it. How to disengage from it.
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Running on Empty
- Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect
- By: Jonice Webb PhD, Christine Musello PsyD
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Do you sometimes feel as if you're just going through the motions in life? Are you good at looking and acting as if you're fine, but secretly feel lonely and disconnected? If so, you are not alone. The world is full of people who have an innate sense that something is wrong with them - who feel they live on the outside looking in, but have no explanation for this feeling and no way to put it into words.
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multi level marketing hook, expect spam.
- By aj on 01-01-18
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Overcoming the Destructive Inner Voice
- True Stories of Therapy and Transformation
- By: Robert W. Firestone
- Narrated by: Will Damron
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Many people grapple with destructive thought processes or a "critical inner voice" that directs their behavior and, to varying degrees, limits their lives. Using deeply personal and very human stories based on his own clinical practice, noted psychologist Robert W. Firestone illustrates the struggles of his clients to give words to this "enemy within", and in the process overcome its damaging influence.
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Good book
- By Albert on 08-03-18
Summary
Parents act as a mirror to show a child who she or he is. Throughout childhood there will be other mirrors, but children inevitably return to the reflection in that original mirror in order to determine their goodness, importance, and self-worth. In Healing Your Emotional Self, Beverly Engle offers her highly effective Mirror Therapy program to help you reject the distorted images your parents either intentionally or unintentionally projected onto you. She explores the seven types of emotionally abusive or neglectful parents and the seven most common parental mirrors, providing specific advice and recovery strategies for each one.
Helping you raise your self-esteem and improve your self-image, this innovative step-by-step program provides you with the skills you need to:
- Create a positive self-image separate from your abusive parents' distorted picture
- Separate emotionally from your parents and provide for yourself what you missed as a child
- Discover who you really are – including your likes, dislikes, values, goals, and dreams – by creating a word self-portrait and using other Mirror Therapy techniques
- Overcome your tendency toward self-blame, self-hatred, and self-destructiveness
- Learn self-nurturing and set effective limits to help you control your tendency to overeat, drink too much, overspend, and/or overwork
- Become the person you are meant to be by being more accepting of yourself
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying reference material will be available in your My Library section along with the audio.
Critic reviews
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- The Nice Guy
- 12-11-16
Monotone reader and awful audio quality
The book itself may be good--I don't know yet--but this performance/recording is depressing to listen.
14 of 14 people found this review helpful
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- Susan Lagocki
- 06-12-17
it wasn't for me
I only listened to first bit. didn't like
It. my fault as didn't research first
1 of 1 people found this review helpful
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- Caron
- 22-02-18
Lacks substance and is annoyingly repetitive.
Found the constant repeating of words frustrating with very little practical information or substance to the advice given in the book. Disappointed.
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- wealthiestforever
- 21-08-17
Don't listen unless u want to hate your parents
Having received much therapy as well as given lots of therapy since becoming cleared I was quite shocked to hear this book
Basically every parent ever is emotionally abusing their kids according to this woman
And no we do t forgive them
We blame them for their horrid treatment of us
Harsh to say the least
I think we are better to clear our own issues with our parents before we start trying to help others with theirs
What people do unconsciously is not done on purpose to hurt others
Most parents are unconscious in some way or other
Hence we teach conscious parenting
I thought I had found a book to help me heal past trauma
Instead I hate my parents and my self after hearing hand of this
Maybe the more we hate them the more therapists can make from us ?
Not sure
A few really nice bits
But the rest is to be avoided if you are a forgiving compassionate person I feel
0 of 1 people found this review helpful
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- Carmen Carrol
- 19-05-16
Best self help book ever read
One of the most self help book I've ever read. I highly recommend this book if you are dealing with emotional hurts it has helped me a lot. Thank you!
3 of 13 people found this review helpful
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- stylo
- 02-09-16
I highly recommend this book!
What made the experience of listening to Healing Your Emotional Self the most enjoyable?
It reenforced the truth that our parents values do not have to be ours, we can be free of shame and guilt. We can discover our 'true' self, even after decades of emotional abuse.
What was one of the most memorable moments of Healing Your Emotional Self?
Realising I was the child of narcissistic parents. So much of my past suddenly made sense. Plus the freedom of knowing righteous anger is not only okay, but essential if we wish to receive true healing.
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
Not possible! It is a book that needs to be listened to slowly and repeatedly. It is essential to stop and make time to do the suggested healing exercises.
Any additional comments?
I have read various books on emotional healing, but I found this one to be the most helpful.
1 of 11 people found this review helpful
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- Epele
- 28-06-16
Healing
Thank you Beverly Engel for all that work! Very profound, mentally nourishing, healing, estetick and beautiful.
1 of 12 people found this review helpful
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- Robert A. Pawlikowski
- 22-10-12
Presumes a damaged childhood
Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?
While this might make a list of recommended books, it would not be among the first on the list.
Would you be willing to try another book from Beverly Engel? Why or why not?
I believe the content is sound, and based on years of training and experience. I have no doubt that what is presented is accurate and has insight.
Would you be willing to try another one of Vanessa Hart’s performances?
I might. The material in this book is somewhat dry. Ms. Hart's voice is sometimes too soothing - I wouldn't recommend this book while driving!
Do you think Healing Your Emotional Self needs a follow-up book? Why or why not?
Perhaps, but it was the wrong book for my particular needs.
Any additional comments?
This book assumes a person has problems with that stem from bad parenting. In listening to it, I found myself being thankful for my parents who were not abusive, inattentive, manipulative, narcissistic, hyper-critical, etc.
If that is your story, then I believe this book to be quite useful (and I wish you a succesful journey from such a dark place). If you have feelings of inadequacy that are not directly related to your relationship with your parents, this is NOT the book for you.
28 of 33 people found this review helpful
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- Rebecca B
- 19-05-17
New narrator, please!
The book is a good follow up to Engels other books, although there is a lot of repetition for treatment. What really took away from this audiobook for me, however, was the narration. The reader sounds monotone and lifeless, I honestly spent the first 10 minutes of the book attempting to see if it was an actual person reading it, or a computer program. Very lifeless and monotonous.
3 of 3 people found this review helpful
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- Catherine
- 22-09-13
Great for anyone into self development
Would you listen to Healing Your Emotional Self again? Why?
Absolutely! I think you need to listen more than once as there is so much "work" to do with each chapter, internal reflection. Loved all the examples the author brought into the story telling.
What’s an idea from the book that you will remember?
That parental abuse comes in many forms. I'd typically thought of abuse as physical, sexual or of neglectful parent ... hadn't really thought of critical, rejecting or emotional absentee parent would fall in that category.
Any additional comments?
At times I found hard to listen to as it brought up feelings I hadn't realized I'd been harbouring. But by the end of the book I felt I had my eyes opened and look forward to working on the exercises the author has at the end of each chapter.
10 of 12 people found this review helpful
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- Scott
- 04-06-13
Deadly Narrator
What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?
Terrible narration. Couldn't finish it.
How could the performance have been better?
Another narrator
What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?
Some useful stuff there....just couldn't stomach listening to the narrator, so I didn't get too far.
10 of 13 people found this review helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 12-02-18
great book- eyes opening
you can really understand what drives many of your and others behavior, helps to have more empathy and self compassion. A bit too many different exercises.
1 of 1 people found this review helpful
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- Amber Akerman
- 16-11-17
Helpful!
super helpful, i read it in just 2 weeks and noticed an immediate difference in my thought patterns and daily life
1 of 1 people found this review helpful
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- Aaron
- 09-08-15
Huge help
I didn't even understand my pain till I listened. Thank you. I honestly think that this book could help almost everyone to an extent.
3 of 4 people found this review helpful
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- Tia Weedon
- 26-06-15
Insightful
I did find this book helpful. It does get a little dark In my opinion when she self discloses and if you have that sort of darkness in your past this could be helpful. In my case my childhood wasn't horrible and it's difficult to say that my parents were either neglectful or narcissistic so sometimes it was hard to relate.
3 of 4 people found this review helpful
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- Andrea Almeida
- 14-01-15
the most helpful book that I ever read<br />
loved it ! this book and the exercise helped me so much to understand and accept myself in the caring , loving way. giving myself credit for so much accomplish that I didn't even realized before. if you have always struggle with your past and self-esteem do yourself a favor and read this book I guarantee it will change your life .
4 of 6 people found this review helpful
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- Lee
- 02-06-16
My Emotional Self after many brain surgeries
Ms. Hart was difficult for me to listen to. I would have rather listened to the author. As for the content I have reviewed and listened to the audiobook multiple times and found her other book about emotional abuse, a better listen.
3 of 5 people found this review helpful