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Critical Failures: Caverns and Creatures, Book 1 Audiobook

Critical Failures: Caverns and Creatures, Book 1

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Publisher's Summary

Tim and his friends find out the hard way that you shouldn't question the game master, and you shouldn't make fun of his cape.

One minute, they're drinking away the dreariness of their lives, escaping into a fantasy game and laughing their asses off. The next minute, they're in a horse-drawn cart surrounded by soldiers pointing crossbows at them.

Tim now has the voice and physique of a prepubescent girl. Dave finds that while he lost a foot or two in height, he somehow acquired a suit of armor and a badass beard. Julian's ears have grown ridiculously long and pointy. And Cooper... well Cooper has gotten himself a set of tusks, a pair of clawed hands, and a bad case of the shits. He also finds that he's carrying a bag with a human head in it - a head that he had chopped off when they were still just playing a game.

Shit just got real, and if they want to survive, these four friends are going to have to tap into some baser instincts they didn't even know existed in their fast-food and pizza delivery world.

It's fight, flight, or try to convince the people who are trying to kill them that they don't really exist.

©2012 Robert Bevan (P)2014 Robert Bevan

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.3 (198 )
5 star
 (104)
4 star
 (58)
3 star
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2 star
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Overall
4.1 (188 )
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3 star
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1 star
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Story
4.3 (188 )
5 star
 (105)
4 star
 (53)
3 star
 (21)
2 star
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1 star
 (3)
Performance
Sort by:
  •  
    robert brooks 21/06/2016
    robert brooks 21/06/2016 Member Since 2018
    HELPFUL VOTES
    6
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    79
    11
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    Story
    "ever played d&d"

    if you have you gota read this it's a blast
    just like we used to play lol

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    legeon United Kingdom 16/08/2015
    legeon United Kingdom 16/08/2015 Member Since 2017
    HELPFUL VOTES
    6
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    14
    5
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    FOLLOWING
    0
    2
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "D20"

    Propper laugh out loud stuff. Need the other books in the series
    Come on audible get them

    4 of 5 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Upgrade 279 24/07/2017
    Upgrade 279 24/07/2017
    HELPFUL VOTES
    1
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    4
    3
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    Story
    "Interesting start to a series"

    I came here from Authors and Dragons. Robert Bevan creates an interesting view into a role-playing game where the characters are put into the game. The characters aren't afraid to be dicks, are the type of players who want to have a relaxed session and are forced into a serious game of life and death, and react as most people might: by panic and threats to a higher power.
    An enjoyable read, the narrator does a good variety of voices, though it feels a bit unfinished towards the end... But that's what sequels are for!
    I will be getting the next issue in the series, of course, as I want to find out more about how the weird world works, what's in store and if a freezer can be opened by a vindictive weirdy-beard.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    ScallN20 22/06/2017
    ScallN20 22/06/2017 Member Since 2017
    HELPFUL VOTES
    1
    ratings
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    6
    1
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    Story
    "Good start but was missing something"

    I enjoyed this but feels like the first half of a book. Hopefully the second will push the story forward at a more satisfying pace. Overall though I'd recommend it.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Slug 02/06/2017
    Slug 02/06/2017 Member Since 2014
    HELPFUL VOTES
    3
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    70
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    Story
    "Great!"

    Brilliant characters with a great plot. They really have CRIT FAILED and on to book 2

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    rasmus 22/12/2016
    rasmus 22/12/2016
    HELPFUL VOTES
    2
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    35
    21
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    Story
    "Occasionally funny and very uneventful"

    The humor consisted mostly of "your mom" jokes and profanity.
    Almost nothing happens in the story and its mostly just the characters being confused and angry with each other.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    kingsys 02/09/2016
    kingsys 02/09/2016 Member Since 2017
    HELPFUL VOTES
    5
    ratings
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    45
    9
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    "good but issues"

    enjoyed it, only down side is the gap between chapters. they're too long and if I'm doing something whilst listening I keep thinking it's stopped or I've had a message arrive. if the gaps where smaller it would have flowed better too

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Amazon Customer 02/05/2017 Member Since 2017
    HELPFUL VOTES
    2
    ratings
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    39
    2
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    Story
    "Unpleasant banter, interesting situations"

    'Gay' repeatedly used as an insult reduced the joy I got from reading this book.

    2 of 3 people found this review helpful
  •  
    James Hannam 04/07/2016
    James Hannam 04/07/2016 Member Since 2017
    HELPFUL VOTES
    6
    ratings
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    23
    18
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    "in.bloody.credible!"

    this is a fantastic audio book! The characters and voice overs are fantastic! As someone who hasn't played D&D (C&C) all I want to do now is play it! can't wait for the next book!

    2 of 3 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Oliver 19/05/2016
    Oliver 19/05/2016 Member Since 2015
    HELPFUL VOTES
    24
    ratings
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    26
    5
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    0
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    "Tosh"

    Bad jokes, poorly written and terribly unsatisfying conclusion. It seems to have been written by a 14-year-old with a need to constantly sweat and make sexual innuendo. Concept was interesting, and the characters, for the most part, were endearing. Still, I am requesting a refund on this.

    4 of 7 people found this review helpful
Sort by:
  • M. Maryanow
    Montgomery, AL USA
    01/02/15
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Audible Studio...More Please!"

    If you have a problem with base humor, you will want to pass this book up.

    I played Dungeons & Dragons when I was young, which is where Caverns & Creatures comes in without bothering a trademark. I would say all folks that enjoy MMORPGs would like the book but younger readers may not realize D & D is the predecessor of online fantasy gaming and will not find the humor of 20-sided dice and the pains of a dungeon master as funny as the older folks that played games before the Internet; however, C & C shares enough MMORPGs characteristics, especially since the characters are sucked inside the game, that fantasy gamers would enjoy this book almost as much.

    I emailed a request for the rest of the series to be put on audio. I don't think the audio version exists but there are a number of books. Maybe if I get enough votes here, audible will raise an eyebrow at how many people like it.

    214 of 220 people found this review helpful
  • Sugarpucker
    MD, United States
    08/01/15
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Very Entertaining"

    I thought this book was very entertaining. Shakespeare it was not, but there was a nice coherent story with good character development. This will obviously appeal to people who have played games like D&D. I mean it references character sheets, charisma, random encounters, and rolling a 1, so there you go. It is not a 'gritty' book. There is much joking and bumbling along with the action. It goes pretty much how you would expect it to go if a bunch of casual gamers had to actually become their characters. Some of the content was kinda stereotypical, but I still think it was handled in a funny way. I enjoyed it. If you like gaming and don't take yourself too seriously, I think you will enjoy it too.

    The narrator was awesome. He did great with the different voices and characters and their expression.

    68 of 70 people found this review helpful
  • JJ
    04/01/18
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Unsatisfying"

    Shallow and annoying characters, a very weak story line, stilted dialogue, and a really unsatisfying ending. Three of the main characters are completely indistinguishable except for height and strength. None of them are likable. There are a few funny moments in the book, but not enough to actually make the book worth it. If it wasn’t free, I would ask for my money back.

    7 of 7 people found this review helpful
  • TnA
    Cambridge, MA, United States
    02/06/15
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Really Funny if you are a Nerd who played RPGs"
    Where does Critical Failures rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

    Top 10


    What was one of the most memorable moments of Critical Failures?

    I was listening to the book while working on the bench in the lab and I had to laugh out loud. People thought I am crazy and I actually had to stop listening for a while to get myself under control. The characters are carbon copies of my old RPG group from 20 years ago. I would tell you why but I don't want to spoil the moment.


    Have you listened to any of Jonathan Sleep’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

    Incredible range of voices that are never annoying


    11 of 12 people found this review helpful
  • looking for great reads
    Southwest NM USA
    11/08/15
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "ATTENTION AUDIBLE: GET THE SEQUELS RECORDED--NOW!"
    What did you love best about Critical Failures?

    It was different, engaging, and the characters were hysterically funny.


    What was one of the most memorable moments of Critical Failures?

    The horse in the jail.


    Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    Constantly laugh-out-loud. No crying. It was delightful.


    Any additional comments?

    I'm not now, nor even have been, a teenaged boy. I am a 60 yr old female. I have never played Dungeons and Dragons, had only a vague idea what was involved in that game. This book was a great introduction to that world, especially as one character was being introduced to it himself, and the story was fun, funny and a great listen with an excellent narrator. I immediately went to download the sequel, only to find it is NOT ON AUDIBLE. GRR. I will listen to/buy whatever else this guy writes, and I have already sent this book to a relative in hard copy, who also greatly enjoyed it.

    22 of 25 people found this review helpful
  • Amanda
    26/07/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Bought the second book 30 sec after finishing this one"

    Yup. I liked it. Played on a car trip with the fam (older kids). Lots of cursing, and hilarious. Be prepared for a barrage of F-bombs.

    10 of 11 people found this review helpful
  • Brent
    Redmond, WA, United States
    07/06/15
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Fun, but..."

    I enjoyed this book. I kept going back to it and finished it in a few days. That said, this has to be the dumbest group of people to ever get stuck in an alternate universe. They also swear, a lot. Nearly every other sentence has the f-word. If you can forgive those two things it's an entertaining book.

    15 of 17 people found this review helpful
  • Bryce
    26/05/15
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Please get the rest..."
    Where does Critical Failures rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

    I have over 1200 audible books (hundreds of which are history) so this question is a bit odd for me to try to answer, I'll just say it's one of the most fun novels I've heard in a long while.


    What was one of the most memorable moments of Critical Failures?

    Look I really liked the whole flow. All of the characters are unique and entertaining.


    Have you listened to any of Jonathan Sleep’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

    Nope but I will...


    Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    I actually laughed out loud... I was wearing a Bluetooth headset so people stared at me... It was worth it.


    Any additional comments?

    Seriously, audible needs Bevan's whole catelogue.

    18 of 21 people found this review helpful
  • andrew
    05/05/15
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "F-ing awesome and hilarious"

    I'm a big role player fan, and this brings the reality an fantasy together beautifully. I've wondered what would happen if you dropped real players into their characters and thus is an amazing answer. And a great beginning to a series. And the voice acting and narration makes it all more believable.

    8 of 9 people found this review helpful
  • Brandon J Smith
    09/04/15
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "A fantastic, funny break from reality."
    Would you consider the audio edition of Critical Failures to be better than the print version?

    I thoroughly enjoyed Jonathan Sleep's performance in reading this audiobook, so much in fact, that I contacted the author to find out if he had plans to add the subsequent books to audible's collection (to which he quickly responded that it's already under works). I'm sure I would enjoy reading the book, but I have no doubt that it was made more enjoyable by Jonathan Sleep's performance. His voices were very entertaining, bringing so much color to the characters.


    What did you like best about this story?

    I probably enjoyed the humor the most, with the bantering back and forth between the characters, made even funnier by the voices the narrator added.


    Which scene was your favorite?

    Pretty much any scene in which Cooper made a sarcastic comment.


    If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?

    For these four tabletop adventurers, shit is about to get real...


    Any additional comments?

    What a great way to break away from reality, and just enjoy a good story with colorful characters. Can't wait to listen to the next one!

    8 of 9 people found this review helpful

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