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Dance of the Reptiles
- Rampaging Tourists, Marauding Pythons, Larcenous Legislators, Crazed Celebrities, and Tar-Balled Beaches: Selected Columns
- Narrated by: Arte Johnson
- Length: 12 hrs and 42 mins
- Categories: History, Americas
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5 out of 5 stars
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5 out of 5 stars
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 44
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 67
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Performance3.5 out of 5 stars 59
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2 out of 5 stars
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All potential lost to a bad reader
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Tourist season is swinging into high gear in Miami. So are the activities of a bizarre terrorist group determined to keep the hapless "snowbirds" away. Armed with bombs, weed, and jumbled credos, they move toward their grand target, the Orange Bowl Parade, with plans to bring Miami and its tourist trade to a halt.
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Disappointed
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Reality TV star Buck Nance incites a riot in a bar and vanishes in the melee. His agent, Lane Coolman, has been accidentally taken hostage by two petty criminals who now think they can turn a quick profit by ransoming an LA talent agent.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Jack Reacher jumps off a bus and walks 14 miles down a country road into Margrave, Georgia. An arbitrary decision he's about to regret. Reacher is the only stranger in town on the day they have had their first homicide in 30 years. The cops arrest Reacher and the police chief turns eyewitness to place him at the scene. As nasty secrets leak out and the body count mounts, one thing is for sure.
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Faithful narration to the very last "he said"!
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Wahoo Cray lives in a zoo. His father is an animal wrangler, so he's grown up with all manner of gators, snakes, parrots, rats, monkeys, snappers, and more in his backyard. The critters he can handle. His father is the unpredictable one.
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4 out of 5 stars
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The Edible Exile
- A Byliner Original
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 4
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Cuervo is a pampered Nicaraguan moneyman, funding a guerrilla war from his cushy Miami penthouse. Sixto is his hulking, pistol-packing attendant, whose job satisfaction is on the wane. When an aging mobster enters their lives with a promise to help the rebel cause - with a planeload of chickens originally intended for voodoo sacrifice - a tense situation turns combustible. From the wickedly funny mind of Carl Hiaasen comes "The Edible Exile", a raucous story of sleazeball nihilists, lovable thugs, and jungle-weary freedom fighters who collide in a battle of wills, ego, and the almighty dollar.
Summary
If you think the wildest, wackiest stories that Carl Hiaasen can tell have all made it into his hilarious, best-selling novels, think again. Dance of the Reptiles collects the best of Hiaasen's Miami Herald columns, which lay bare the stories - large and small - that demonstrate anew that truth is far stranger than fiction.
Hiaasen offers his commentary - indignant, disbelieving, sometimes righteously angry, and frequently hilarious - on burning issues like animal welfare, polluted rivers, and the broken criminal justice system as well as the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, Bernie Madoff's trial, and the shenanigans of the recent presidential elections. Whether or not you have read Carl Hiaasen before, you are in for a wild ride.
Critic reviews
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What listeners say about Dance of the Reptiles
Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Ron
- 12-02-14
Great book. Required reading!
I've read pretty much all of Carl Haaasen's novels but wasn't sure how I'd like a book containing his newspaper editorials.
Wow, was I surprised. This book is brilliant. It has everything from humor to political shenanigans.
Arte Johnson is masterful as the reader.
Should be required reading for all politicians.
7 people found this helpful
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Sierra
- 13-03-14
Loved the stories!
Would you consider the audio edition of Dance of the Reptiles to be better than the print version?
I loved this book and the narration was spot-on. I felt the Carl Hiaasen got a little preachy in parts but overlooking that it was a great listen.
3 people found this helpful
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- HIYBRID
- 11-06-19
Three scoops of classic Carl
If you've never read this fellows stories... Where the heck have you been????? His characters are graduates of Walt Disney mental hospital. The plots more twisted than spaghetti cooked. I can't help being drawn in and binge reading for hours. Bravo Carl Bravo!!!
2 people found this helpful
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story2 out of 5 stars
- Tommy Bergeron
- 15-04-18
No Tales of Humor
Would you try another book from Carl Hiaasen and Diane Stevenson (editor) and/or Arte Johnson?
I've read all of Carl Hiaasen's novel, and find them hilarious.
What was most disappointing about Carl Hiaasen and Diane Stevenson (editor) ’s story?
This book is nothing but political stories from Hiassen's extremely liberal point of view.
What didn’t you like about Arte Johnson’s performance?
The narration seemed unrehearsed. There was no natural flow.
What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?
I was disappointed. I thought that the book would contain stories about crazy criminal acts and public servants doing unscrupulous deeds. No...90% liberal politics mostly aimed towards Bush, Republicans, the NRA.
Any additional comments?
I'll still read his novels. He's a great writer, and they make me laugh. I will steer away from his other 2 collections of essays.
2 people found this helpful
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Shelly Dee
- 08-05-16
Love Hiaasen; hated this
Way old stuff and not a typical Hiaasen anything that I'm used to reading by him. I realize this is a compilation, but still ... disappointed.
2 people found this helpful
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story2 out of 5 stars
- garden guru
- 23-12-14
Sad stories
Would you try another book from Carl Hiaasen and Diane Stevenson (editor) and/or Arte Johnson?
Carl Hiaasen novels are more enjoyable than this collection of true but distressing tales.
What could Carl Hiaasen and Diane Stevenson (editor) have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?
The humor in Carl Hiaasen novels helps a great deal.
Which scene was your favorite?
No favorites here.
Do you think Dance of the Reptiles needs a follow-up book? Why or why not?
No, no follow ups, please.
2 people found this helpful
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Ingibjörg Kolbeins
- 15-03-14
Too local for a European
I love carl Hiaasens novels. This book is a collection of his newspaper columns. If you are not a Floridian a lot of it will go over your head. But if you are familiar with Florida polliticks I am sure you will enjoy it .
2 people found this helpful
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
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Performance1 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- Paul Sly
- 27-08-18
Mostly Florida political rants
No real story or thread to it. I was hoping for more Hiaasen humor and hijinks.
1 person found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- DONA
- 02-11-17
APT FOR TODAY
I was going to call this review a History of Today. It is so very relevant to 2017 and the American political landscape that I kept being amused by the irony. The author cares about creation and the ecology of Florida's inland as well as the popular coastal vacation areas. He also cares about the economy and the people who retire to the state, thinking it will be a good place to live out the rest of their lives in warmth and comfort.
Hiaasen is not writing about 2017, however, or all of American politics -- his columns from the news in Florida several years ago ironically fit todasy's climate. And, they are funny in a sarcastic way. Not being from the sunshine state I appreciated this insider's view of FL and its development over time. Incidentally, I read the book right before Hurricanes Harvey, Irma, Jose asnd Maria hit the Gulf Coast and Southern FL this year. His words seemed almost prophetic.
1 person found this helpful
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Kelly W.
- 18-08-20
Every Republican should listen
Carl provides hilarious, 100% Libtard, hypocritical accounts of semi-recent events. I especially love his excruciatingly long diatribe on how easy it is to falsify absentee ballots in Florida . . . . while today's Democrats are pushing for cheat-by-mail all over the country. Of course, he missed the point on the salient Republican sex scandals of the era (Foley, Hastert, Craig, and Sanford).. Mark Sanford should have been singled out as the only one of the group in a heterosexual scandal 🤣🤣😂😁 -- not that there is anything wrong with that 😁😁. At least he didn't pay any hush money over it either!