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Unmentionable Audiobook

Unmentionable: The Victorian Lady's Guide to Sex, Marriage, and Manners

Regular Price:£26.79
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Publisher's Summary

Have you ever wished you could live in an earlier, more romantic era?

Ladies, welcome to the 19th century, where there's arsenic in your face cream, a pot of cold pee sits under your bed, and all of your underwear is crotchless. (Why? Shush, dear. A lady doesn't question.)

Unmentionable is your hilarious, scandalously honest (yet never crass) guide to the secrets of Victorian womanhood, giving you detailed advice on:

  • What to wear
  • Where to relieve yourself
  • How to conceal your loathsome addiction to menstruating
  • What to expect on your wedding night
  • How to be the perfect Victorian wife
  • Why masturbating will kill you
  • And more

Irresistibly charming, laugh-out-loud funny, Unmentionable will inspire a whole new level of respect for Elizabeth Bennett, Scarlett O'Hara, Jane Eyre, and all of our great-great-grandmothers.

(And it just might leave you feeling ecstatically grateful to live in an age of pants, superabsorbency tampons, epidurals, antidepressants, and not dying of the syphilis your husband brought home.)

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying reference material will be available in your My Library section along with the audio.

©2016 Therese Oneill (P)2016 Hachette Audio

What the Critics Say

"A down-and-dirty perusal of the realities of hygiene and womanhood in the Victorian era. The truth behind slimming corsets, virtuous nuptials, and strict morals is sometimes shocking, occasionally alarming, but always funny with Oneill's wry commentary." (Library Journal)

"Flat-out hysterical (and occasionally alarming).... Read it and be very, very glad you're a woman of modern times." (Good Housekeeping)

"Oneill uncovers the filthy, untidy, licentious conditions of 19th-century women's lives that novelists of the period often glossed over." (Elle)

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.0 (31 )
5 star
 (15)
4 star
 (7)
3 star
 (5)
2 star
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1 star
 (1)
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4.0 (31 )
5 star
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Story
4.1 (31 )
5 star
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3 star
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2 star
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1 star
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Performance
Sort by:
  •  
    Mrs B 31/07/2017
    Mrs B 31/07/2017 Member Since 2013
    HELPFUL VOTES
    4
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    38
    4
    FOLLOWERS
    FOLLOWING
    0
    0
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Sorry just too American kitsch"

    This could have been an excellent view into the personal world of the Victorian woman and it is a very interesting era and the subject matter not really visited before, BUT oh dear, it's written like the author is a stand up comedian and not a very funny one. In addition the narrator has the most infuriating intonation!! Agggh!!! She sing songs her way along the subject matter and frankly condescends to the listener. It was like listening to a cat being strangled and I had to stop listening before I threw my phone at the wall. What a shame, as a woman I was finding the content fascinating but it was written and narrated in far too an American kitsch way.

    4 of 4 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Heather Buchanan 02/01/2018
    HELPFUL VOTES
    1
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    2
    1
    FOLLOWERS
    FOLLOWING
    0
    0
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Condescending"

    Found it patronising in tone, and various facts glossed over, or cherry-picked to fit in with the topic.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Tink 03/08/2017
    Tink 03/08/2017 Member Since 2015
    HELPFUL VOTES
    3
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    31
    5
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    0
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    "hilariously entertaining"

    loved this, had me hooked from the start. wonderfully read, scarily grateful to be modern.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    R. woods 05/07/2017
    R. woods 05/07/2017 Member Since 2017
    HELPFUL VOTES
    2
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    11
    2
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    Story
    "Charming"

    Utterly fascinating, Read with humour and wit and written in a delightfully original format, this will go on my list as one of my favourite audio books of all time.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
Sort by:
  • T. Keefe
    Canada
    02/11/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Humorous, Fun and Educational"

    I very much enjoyed how this book took the tone of speaking directly to a modern woman, instead of simply pumping out a multitude of facts.
    It is rare to learn and be entertained - this book accomplishes both, without talking down to you.

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • echan003
    19/04/17
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Interesting and funny but, at times, repetitive"

    I enjoyed the book and can understand the choice for the narrator's tone but it became repetitive listening to her snippy comments. The point I most enjoyed was when she seemed to slip out of the Victorian character to express her disgust at one of the time's leading 'scientists'.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  • Tammico Cubie
    10/12/16
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Every woman should have this book!!"

    The story and narration were both amazing. I want to have every book by her.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  • Sarah E. Miller
    16/01/18
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Hilarious and Disturbing"

    Very interesting read, spares no details. Prose is a little over-the-top but lots of fun!

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • jb11
    michigan
    13/12/17
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "I hope my review does this book justice."

    I've been an Audible monthly member since 2000. That's almost 18 years of a book subscription. There are a very small handful that I return to, and THIS book has just shot to the top of that list. The trick to sidesplitting humor is cleverly finding and communicating certain truths. Our dear writer must've been in knots throughout the writing of this book. Her caustic wit expresses itself in such a way that illustrates absurdity PERFECTLY! The performer has proven herself to be the ideal match to this writer. Her inflections are spot on, and had me cracking up on a regular basis. If you've EVER thought that the 19th century was a romantic, dreamy era to live in, this will change your mind. I have no doubt that I've missed parts, so I'll be going back to make sure I catch everything. Again... and again... and again... Buy this book, you will not regret it! Oh, and the accompanying .pdf does not disappoint, either! I LOVE THIS BOOK!!!

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Dana
    31/10/17
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "absolutely hysterical!"

    This was a surprising find! The book is put together perfectly with a good balance of history paired with wit and humor. While the humor might seem to poke fun at the era, it does it with good grace and understanding of the knowledge base the era had at the time. I would recommend this book to everyone who enjoys Austin and other writers of her time.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Adam
    25/06/17
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Ladies, it's worth it!"

    The delivery was outstanding. I found the book interesting - unlike anything else I've even considered.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Evangeline Anderson
    Fl, USA
    08/06/17
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "A funny and not so funny look at the past"

    For those wishing to go back in time to the romantic past this book has some hard--and hilarious truths for you. You are guided on a tour of the Victorian era with all of the ridiculously complicated social norms and incredibly elaborate clothing included. My main take away from this was that I'm awfully glad I live now instead of then. This book is more than just funny – it's thought provoking, especially at the end when you realize how far we've come as women. highly recommended!

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Buck & Ashley Pardee
    25/04/17
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "so fun !"

    Very funny & inlightinig. The reader was great too. I would highly recommend this book to anyone.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Goat Mama
    Arkansas
    27/01/17
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "time travelers guide to NEVER go to this time zon"

    loved this book, very entertaining and interesting. pretty glad I wasn't born then!

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful

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