In her most affirming and life-changing book yet, Dr. Harriet Lerner teaches us how to restore love and connection with the people who matter the most. In The Dance of Connection we learn what to say (and not say) when:
Filled with compelling personal stories and case examples, Lerner outlines bold new "voice lessons" that show us how to speak with honor and personal integrity, even when the other person behaves badly.
Whether we're dealing with a partner, parent, sister, or best friend, The Dance of Connection teaches us how to navigate our most important relationships with clarity, courage, and joyous conviction.
©1999 Harriet Lerner; (P)2001 HarperCollins Publishers, Inc.
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"Listen at 1.5x speed"
I loved Dance of Anger and Brene Brown mentioned this book in one of her talks so I figured it would be a sure win.
The narration is definitely the worst thing about this recording. Even at 1.25 speed its too slow.
The content is good, although it's necessary to sift through the stories for the jewels of wisdom.
Overall, there is some great learning to be had but not the best audiobook I have experienced.
"Good and Bad"
The content of the book is helpful and informative, but it should not have been read by the author. Her voice is just not suitable for a book of this length. It comes across as dreary and monotonous. I can't put my finger on it exactly.
Perhaps if the author did the reading along with someone else it would help. Unfortunately I fell asleep a few times, which is a pity, because the subject matter is excellent, and I'm sure it reads well in print.
This was very informative. I learned a lot of techniques for communicating with family and others. Definitely worth the time. I did however have to run it on 1.5x as the narrator read extremely slow! Even with it at this speed there were times it was slow!!
"Really good, helpful book"
This is a very good book to help you say what you need to say when you need to say it most... It also helps you realize that saying "nothing" is ok, especially when you need to get anger under control or process what has happened first. Also, just b/c you might want to discuss something doesn't mean the other party is willing to, now or ever, and sometimes we have to deal with that.
She sounded like she was trying too hard to enunciate each word perfectly and spontaneity and rhythm and emphasis were left out b/c of it. It did not sound natural. Nonetheless, I became accustomed to her style of speaking and gained useful info from the book.
No. I think it would be hard to listen to all at once b/c some topics need time to be thought over and digested. It's a self-help book, not a thriller.
Overall, I would recommend it. Be patient with the narration. There's good stuff in there.
"The Dance of Connection"
I have the book "The Dance of Anger" and wanted to get the Audio version so I could listen to it in my car. But somehow as I was browsing around I ended up downloading the Dance of Connection instead of the book I wanted... What a disappointment. At the time I bought this audio book the information on it was not informative enough that one could make a clear decision and really know what they were getting...
It seams her audience for this book is for older people struggling to cope and stay connected to loved ones as their health is failing and how spouses should deal with the failing health of the other in a loving supportive way... Not a bad idea for a book and I am sure if this is the kind of book you're looking for that you might be happy with your purchace... But being that I am in my early 30's I had no idea this was the point of the book... Also the author herself is reading the book and after 2 hours of listening to her voice it's about enough to drive someone nuts... She has a very mellow soft voice and speaks very slowly and I found it hard to not get bored... But then again if this is for an older audience it might be perfect. So just be wear of that.. I gave it 1 star because the review at the time I got this audio book wasn't clear enough for me to make a better decision. If I would have known what I was looking at I wouldn't have bought it. Also my low rating is because I wouldn't recommend this book to anyone... I really have a hard time appreciating this book... It seams the author just rambles on and on and there really is no clear direction where she is taking the listener... I hope my review will help someone and save them from buying a book they can't even stand to finish listening to as I have... Thank you..
"Excellent Content! Listen to it 1.25x faster."
The book is practical and insightful, with a lot of excellent examples.
The dance of anger
All of them. As she mentioned, do not skip any examples. Even you don't have kids, don't skip the example of mother and her child. The same communication principle will help you in other circumstances.
Let other people worry about their things.
I found this book after reading the dance of anger. I was having a lot of relationship issues - with my husband, my in-laws, and my co-workers. This book has provided quite a few excellent examples. I listened to it again and again and have started to apply the same principles in different cases. I have found that letting people deal with their own issues instead of trying to solving the problems for them makes me so much happier and less stressed about my own life.
I found the information eye opening, informative, simple and worth a listen. My plan is to listen twice, so the messages can really sink in.
the narrator was nice, filled with great life lessons, information reachable to a lot of age groups
"A must listen for those who lost their "voice"."
In regards to personal and interpersonal growth, this ranks right at the top. The scenarios Dr. Lerner chose really hit home for those that have seemed to have lost their "voice" within themselves and their relationships.
For me the scenarios Dr. Lerner chose to help explain her thoughts were on point. They are easy to relate to and her explanation as to how they connect with her message truly help in being able to bring it all together.
This is the really the only negative I have. It does take some time to get used to Dr. Lerner's narration. I can easily see where others have complained about this and that this only turned them off of the audiobook but I saw it as more of a tool. There were times where I had to really concentrate due to the slow pace at times but I felt this gave me a better understanding of what Dr. Lerner was saying.
Yes and I did for the most part. I've even started listening to it again as there's so much information available to the listener that subsequent listens has brought out different takes on the material.
In today's age of living in the fast lane, it's often to easy to get yourself in a groove that becomes detrimental to your relationships. Dr. Lerner has put together some great information to help those that seem lost, overburdened or looking to truly build better relationships with their loved ones.
"Great book, not so keen on the narration"
First off, the subject matter is great and I really think there is something here for anyone who wants to relate better - whether to family, friends or partners. Secondly, I always think it is great to have the book narrated by its author, because they understand and can impart the inflections and emphases they intended. In this case, she has made an effort not to go too fast, or theatrical and it is probably a good idea in terms of getting the content, but on the other hand she sounds like she just took two sleeping tablets. Her voice is way too soporific and I find myself tuning out...
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