Traumatized by the bombing of Dresden at the time he had been imprisoned, Pilgrim drifts through all events and history, sometimes deeply implicated, sometimes a witness. He is surrounded by Vonnegut's usual large cast of continuing characters (notably here the hack science fiction writer Kilgore Trout and the alien Tralfamadorians, who oversee his life and remind him constantly that there is no causation, no order, no motive to existence).
"Worth every penny"
Breakfast of Champions (1973) provides frantic, scattershot satire and a collage of Vonnegut's obsessions. His recurring cast of characters and American landscape was perhaps the most controversial of his canon; it was felt by many at the time to be a disappointing successor to Slaughterhouse-Five, which had made Vonnegut's literary reputation.
"malkovich is fantastic"
Two men with a passion for vinyl create a society for the appreciation of records. Their aim is simple: to elevate the art of listening by doing so in forensic detail. The society enjoys moderate success in the back room of their local pub, The Half Moon, with other enthusiasts drawn to the initial promise of the weekly gathering. However, as the club gains popularity, its founder's uncompromising dogma results in a schism within the movement, and soon a counter group forms.
Crazy Rich Asians is the outrageously funny debut novel about three super-rich, pedigreed Chinese families and the gossip, backbiting, and scheming that occurs when the heir to one of the most massive fortunes in Asia brings home his ABC (American-born Chinese) girlfriend to the wedding of the season. When Rachel Chu agrees to spend the summer in Singapore with her boyfriend, Nicholas Young, she envisions a humble family home, long drives to explore the island, and quality time with the man she might one day marry.
Now, available in audio for the first time, Side Effects is narrated by Woody Allen himself. A humor classic by one of the world's funniest writers, Side Effects is a treat for Allen fans and those just discovering how gifted he is. In classics including "Remembering Needleman", "The Kugelmass Episode", "Confessions of a Burglar", and others, Allen discusses such subjects as the nature of relativity, the UFO menace, and the predicament of modern man.
"Typical Woody - laugh out loud"
Go the F--k to Sleep is a bedtime book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don't always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. California Book Award-winning author Adam Mansbach's profane, affectionate, and radically honest verses perfectly capture the familiar - and unspoken - tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night.
"The Ideal Parenting Tool"
Now in audio for the first time, Without Feathers is narrated by Woody Allen himself. Here they are: 16 of the funniest tales and ruminations ever recorded, by one of the great comic minds of our time. From "The Whore of Mensa", to "Fabulous Tales & Mythical Beasts", to "No Kaddish for Weinstein", old and new Allen fans will laugh themselves silly over these sparkling gems.
In a room above a bizarre German museum lives the Old Man. Caretaker of the museum by day, by night he enjoys the sound of silence, broken by the occasional crunch of a spider between his blackened teeth. Little Hands Clapping brings together the Old Man with the respectable Doctor Ernst Frohlicher, his greedy dog Hans, and a cast of grotesque and hilarious townsfolk, all of whose lives are thrown together as the town uncovers a crime so outrageous that it will shock the world.
"Curious, dark, creepy and delightful."
Bleak Expectations' recounts the remarkable adventures of young Pip Bin as he tries to repair his destroyed family and distinctly damaged life, aided by his best friend Harry Biscuit and definitely not aided by his cruel and ironically named guardian Mr Gently Benevolent and his accomplices, the fearsome Hardthrasher siblings.
"Not as good as the radio"
A fabulously entertaining audiobook from the ultimate authority on those almost believable tales that always happen to a "friend of a friend". Alligators in the sewers? A pet in the microwave? A tragic misunderstanding of the function of cruise control? No, it didn't really happen to your friend's sister's neighbor: It's an urban legend. And no matter how savvy you think you are, you are sure to find in this collection of more than 200 tales at least one story you would have sworn was true.
What's a little arson between friends? Undercover CIA agent Fortune Redding spent her first three weeks in Sinful, Louisiana, dodging insults, makeup advice, guard dogs, bullets, and Deputy Carter Trahan, both professionally and personally. But just when she thinks things are going to settle down in the small bayou town, someone sets her friend Ally's house on fire. Carter, who'd just started pursuing Fortune on a personal basis, goes back into cop mode and admonishes her to stay out of his investigation.
Woody Allen's early comic fiction was heavily influenced by the zany, pun-ridden humor of S.J. Perelman. And now, for the first time, Woody Allen narrates one of his early collections of short stories, Getting Even. Listen to Woody Allen revenge himself on such significant subjects as death, obesity, organized crime, the invention of the sandwich, and much more.
Kevin Kwan, best-selling author of Crazy Rich Asians, is back with a wickedly funny new novel of social climbing, secret e-mails, art-world scandal, lovesick billionaires and the outrageous story of what happens when Rachel Chu, engaged to marry Asia's most eligible bachelor, discovers her birth father. On the eve of her wedding to Nicholas Young, heir to one of the greatest fortunes in Asia, Rachel should be over the moon.
"Story as good as the first - Audio edited poorly."
EXCLUSIVELY AVAILABLE IN AUDIONo one else has Dan Wells' hilarious new novella - it's not available in print, in ebook, by mobile phone text or Victorian phonograph. Audible is bringing it to you exclusively, for a limited time.The basic premise is this: it's 1817, and a man named Frederick Whithers is wallowing in jail for a crime he didn't commit, desperate to get out so he can go and commit it for real.
"A night of utter Joy"
Reginald Iolanthe Perrin, the creation of comedy genius David Nobbs, is surely one of the best-loved comedy heroes of our time - in both literature and television. So it is with great pride that Audible presents Reggie's escapades in digital audio for the very first time: we invite you to join him, and the memorable supporting characters who help him along the way, on one man's quest to avoid an everyday existence.
"An opportunity spurned"
On a cold morning in Grimsby, Albert Hardcastle wakes up to the first day of his retirement. His days of working in a shop are behind him, and he and his wife, Alice, decide to celebrate by taking the luxury cruise of which they always dreamed. Meanwhile, on the Essex coast, Rear Admiral Sir Benbow Harrington, a retired Royal Navy officer, is trying to assemble a fleet of passenger ships. His newest vessel, the Golden Handshake, is ready for its maiden voyage.
Two childhood friends from Scotland and two illegitimate half-brothers from the deep South suffer and enjoy all manner of bizarre adventures that, it turns out, are somehow interconnected and, even more surprisingly, meaningful. The eclectic cast of characters features Socrates, Carl Jung, and Tony Randall, along with an ex-television evangelist with a penchant for booze, prostitutes, and uncomfortable knitwear who gets mugged in Miami by an almost pure-blooded Watusi warrior - and sets off on a road trip in a stolen motor home.
For the first time ever, hear Woody Allen's Mere Anarchy in the author's own distinctive and hilarious voice. Here, in his first short-story collection since his three classics Getting Even, Without Feathers, and Side Effects, Allen has managed to write a book that answers the most profound questions of human existence.
"It's Woody Allen!"
Walter Starbuck, a career humanist and eventual low-level aide in the Nixon White House, is implicated in Watergate and jailed, after which he (like Howard Campbell in Mother Night) works on his memoirs. Starbuck is innocent (his office was used as a base for the Watergate shenanigans of which he had no knowledge), and yet he is not innocent (he has collaborated with power unquestioningly and served societal order all his life). He represents another Vonnegut Everyman caught amongst forces he neither understands nor can defend.
Called "our finest black-humorist" by The Atlantic Monthly, Kurt Vonnegut was one of the most influential writers of the 20th century. Now his first and last works come together for the first time in print, in a collection aptly titled after his famous phrase, We Are What We Pretend To Be.
Waldo Rabbit is back! Waldo and Alice continue on their quest, now accompanied by the ogre Gronk. They are headed to Norwich, where they hope to find the third monster that will be Waldo's last familiar. But things are never as simple as they seem. An archlich, White Mage, and murderous rabbits all stand in the way. Yes, that's right, the murderous flesh eating rabbits make their appearance! Waldo is both the hunter and the hunted.
Olivia Morten is perfect. Maybe she's constantly hungry, but her body is to die for. Maybe her high-flying publicist job has taken over her life, but her clients are LA's hottest celebrities. Maybe her husband is never around, but he is a drop-dead-gorgeous doctor. And maybe her past harbors an incredibly embarrassing secret, but no one remembers high school...right? When Ben Dunn, Olivia's high school archnemesis - and onetime crush - suddenly resurfaces, all of her hard-won perfection begins to unravel.
From the USA Today best-selling author of Sunshine Beach, a story of four women trying to rebuild more than their lives. Embroiled in a battle to regain control of their renovation-turned-reality TV show, Do Over, Maddie, Avery, Nikki, and Kyra find themselves holding tight to the frayed ends of their friendship and relationships.
Unlike in real life, Max is pretty good at playing games, so when a new limited-time dungeon opens up in the virtual reality game he plays, boasting a huge cash prize, Max knows he needs to try and complete it if he wants to be able to pay rent this month. Fortunately, the only guild strong enough to attempt to take it on before the timer runs out needs a tank.
Stephen Leacock (1869-1944) may be considered the Canadian counterpart to Mark Twain. For many years he was professor of economics at Magill University and published a number of well-regarded texts on economics and political science. However, he is best known today for his many volumes of humorous fiction. In Arcadian Adventures with the Idle Rich, Leacock applies a satirical scalpel to the foibles and pretensions of the wealthy and the powerful.
What if your first love came back on the scene...30 years later? After yet another disaster, Lorrie is calling time on online dating. She might be single in her 40s, but she's got a good job and wonderful children, and she's happy. This, Lorrie decides, is going to have to be enough. That is until she receives a very unexpected request from France. Antoine Rousseau, who had once turned a lonely French exchange trip into a summer of romance, wants to see her - after 30 years.
Surprised to find himself reborn as a rambunctious golden-haired puppy after a tragically short life as a stray mutt, Bailey's search for his new life's meaning leads him into the loving arms of eight-year-old Ethan. During their countless adventures, Bailey joyously discovers how to be a good dog. But this life as a family pet is not the end of Bailey's journey. Reborn as a puppy yet again, Bailey wonders - will he ever find his purpose?
"A dogs tail"
Louis Lasker loves his family dearly - apart from when he doesn't. There's a lot of history. His father's marriages, his mother's death; one brother in exile, another in denial; everything said, everything unsaid. And now his father (the best of men, the worst of men) has taken a decision which will affect them all and has asked his three sons to join him on one final journey across Europe. But Louis is far from sure that this trip is a good idea.
>P is for Paris, where it all began. J is for jealousy, where it all came undone. But the most important letter is F. F is for forgiveness, the hardest of all. Sisters Poppy and Rose used to be as close as two sisters could be, but it's been over a decade since they last spoke. Until they both receive a call that tells them their mother has gone - without ever having the chance to see her daughters reunited. Andrea, though, wasn't the kind of woman to let a little thing like death stand in the way of her plans.
Hi, how are you? Yes, I am talking to you, the reader of this book's description. Okay, I get it, fourth-wall breaking is overdone. Get over it. This book, Villains Rule, is a fantasy action-comedy which you have to hear. Not because it redefines the genre, far from it. But rather for what it contains. A villain's tale. How often do you get to listen to a story where the villain is the protagonist? No, not an anti-hero, or a brooding monster, nor a hero thinly disguised as a villain. And not evil. If you want evil, take that nonsense to therapy.
Just because a man cheats on his wife and makes Danny DeVito look tall, dark, and handsome, is that any reason to kill him? The reluctant and quirky PI, Lee Alvarez, doesn't think so. The 34-year old half-Latina, half-WASP and 100% detective has her work cut out for her when the man is murdered on her watch. Of all the nerve. For Lee, this has become personal. From San Francisco's famous Embarcadero to quaint Princeton-by-the-Sea, she is out to find the killer. And for the killer, this has become personal, too.
When her old friend Karen drops by with her two-year-old son, Meg Langslow reluctantly agrees to babysit. But when night falls, the toddler is still in residence, and Karen isn't answering her phone. Concerned, Meg spends the next morning retracing her friend's steps - and what she discovers makes her begin to suspect that Karen has either been killed or kidnapped or is on the run. Since the police don't seem to care, Meg once again plays sleuth.
Will American politics always be dominated by the two major political parties or are voters longing for an independent candidate to challenge the establishment? Benjamin Franklin Foster came on the scene capturing the hearts of American voters with his message of change and reform. Powerful interests intent on preserving the status quo with their bought-and-paid-for politicians were determined to take Ben Foster out of the race. The Secret Service comes up with a quirky plan to protect the candidate and strike a blow for Lady Justice.
More Conversations with Pop is a fun collection of quick flash fiction stories of conversations between a father and his son. Pop has a unique (and sometime annoying) way of viewing life but always finds ways to impart nuggets of wisdom, while engaging in humorous verbal sparring matches with his son who is always there to keep his father grounded. More Conversations with Pop is the second book where listeners get a glimpse into the fascinating mind of Pop.
Roland Merullo's playful, eloquent, and life-affirming novel finds the Pope and the Dalai Lama teaming up for an unsanctioned road trip through the Italian countryside to rediscover the everyday joys of life that can seem, even for the two holiest men in the world, unattainable.
Kelly Frank is EarthCent's top diplomat on Union Station, but her job description has always been a bit vague. The pay is horrible and she's in hock up to her ears for her furniture, which is likely to end up in a corridor because she's behind on rent for her room. Sometimes she has to wonder if the career she has put ahead of her personal life for 15 years is worth it.
Life isn't easy - especially when you're the reclusive daughter of a melodramatic attorney openly mocked for his commercials, and a free-spirited mother who gives art lessons in the nude. Their over the top personalities make it easy for the sheltered and introverted Magnolia Berrybush to swim in a sea of anonymity - until the day she finally snaps.
What happens when an intrepid band of thrill-seeking, rollicking Americans ventures out in search of adrenaline? They learn the hard way that having everything means you have that much more to lose. Orla, a beautiful and sharp-witted young Irish woman, saves the day, earning their loyalty. She proves to be a valuable addition to the globe-trekking crew on a high-stakes journey where discoveries unravel at every turn.
The Cows is a powerful novel about three women. In all the noise of modern life, each needs to find her own voice. It's about friendship and being female. It's bold and brilliant. It's searingly perceptive. It's about never following the herd. And everyone is going to be talking about it.
This is the story of Lizzie Vogel, a 15 year old girl who finds herself working in a ramshackle old people's home in the English suburbs. It is the late 1970s and the place is in chaos - there's a much swisher old people's home nearer the supermarket with better parking which is taking all the best patients; Matron seems to be utterly without qualifications, and Lizzie has no idea what she's doing.
If you've done six impossible things this morning, why not round it off with breakfast at Milliways, the Restaurant at the End of the Universe? Which is exactly what the crew of the Heart of Gold plan to do. There's just the small matter of escaping the Vogons, avoiding being taken to the most totally evil world in the Galaxy and teaching a space ship how to make a proper cup of tea. And did anyone actually make a reservation?
"Not as good as HHGTTG"
Flora is forced to move back to the tiny island of Mure from the bright lights of London. It's tough: even the beautiful landscapes and bright blue sea can't lift her spirits - she's too busy looking after her dad and her feckless brothers. Then she chances upon her mum's collection of recipes and begins to cook her way through it. As she reconnects with her family and the place she was born, might she also find herself?
"Different but brilliant!"
In consequence of a number of stunning catastrophes, Arthur Dent is surprised to find himself living in a hideously miserable cave on prehistoric Earth. However, just as he thinks that things cannot get possibly worse, they suddenly do. He discovers that the Galaxy is not only mind-boggingly big and bewildering but also that most of the things that happen in it are staggeringly unfair.
Meet Zoe and Greg Milton, a married couple who have let themselves go a bit. Zoe was a stunner in her college days, but the intervening decades have added five stone, and removed most of her self-esteem. Greg's rugby-playing days are well and truly behind him, thanks to countless pints of beer and chicken curry. When Elise, a radio DJ and Zoe's best friend, tells them about a new competition, it seems like the perfect opportunity to turn their lives around.
There is a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. It's not an easy thing to do and Arthur Dent thinks he's the only human who's been able to master this nifty little trick - until he meets Fenchurch, the girl of his dreams. Fenchurch knows how the world could be made a good and happy place. Unfortunately she's forgotten. Convinced that the secret lies within God's Final Message to His Creation they go in search of it. And in a dramatic break with tradition - actually find it....
Alice Rose is a foundling, discovered on the Yorkshire moors above Haworth as a baby. Adopted but then later rejected again by a horrid stepmother, Alice struggles to find a place where she belongs. Only baking - the scent of cinnamon and citrus and the feel of butter and flour between her fingers - brings a comforting sense of home. So it seems natural that when she finally decides to return to Haworth, Alice turns to baking again, taking over a run-down little teashop and working to set up an afternoon tea emporium.
8.45 P.M. Realise there have been so many times in my life when have fantasised about going to a scan with Mark or Daniel: just not both at the same time. Before motherhood before marriage Bridget with biological clock ticking very, very loudly finds herself unexpectedly pregnant at the eleventh hour: a joyful pregnancy which is dominated however by a crucial but terribly awkward question - who is the father?
"Has Bridget gone as far as she can go?"
Meet the daughters of Iris Parker. Dee, sensitive and big-hearted; Rose, uptight and controlled; and Fleur, the reckless free spirit. At the reading of their mother's will, the three estranged women are aghast to discover that their inheritance comes with very tricky strings attached. If they are to inherit her wealth, they must spend a series of weekends together over the course of a year and carry out their mother's bucket list.
Daft Wee Stories is Limmy's first book. It is a collection of stories. There are short stories. There are longer stories. There are stupid stories. There are thoughtful stories. There are upside-down stories. There are normal-way-up stories. There are weird stories. There are less weird stories. There are really weird stories. There is nothing else like it. Have a listen.
"Vast collection of funny stories"
Sitting quietly in his room in an old people's home, Allan Karlsson is waiting for a party he doesn't want to begin: his one-hundredth birthday party. Escaping through his bedroom window, into the flowerbed, Allan makes his getaway. And so begins his picaresque and unlikely journey involving criminals, several deaths, a suitcase full of cash, and incompetent but very human police.
Better Than Life finds the crew trapped in a mind-boggling computer game that is threatening their lives and safety of the ship. One by one, they enter the game to rescue each other - and one by one, they become trapped! Holly will have to use his mega brain to solve this one.
"Excellent Sci-Fi, but..."
Abi's left inconsolable when Joseph dumps her, saying they are incompatible. When Joseph returns a box of her possessions, she finds a bucket list of 10 things. What better way to win him back than by completing the list? But Abi's terrified of heights - not ideal when the list includes abseiling down a building. Completing the list is going to need all Abi's courage, but as she heals her broken heart one task at a time, the newly confident Abi might just have a surprise in store....
"hard to put down"
It's 1936, and Tobias Henry is stuck in the frozen hinterlands of Michigan. Tobias is obsessed with two things: God and girls. Mostly girls, of course. But being a Baptist preacher's son, he can't escape God. When his father is blinded in a bizarre accident (involving hard cider and bird droppings), Tobias must ride the rails to Texas to recover a long-hidden stash of money. Along the way, he's initiated into the hobo brotherhood by Craw, a ribald vagabond-philosopher. Obstacles arise in the form of a saucy prostitute, a flaming boxcar, and a man-eating catfish.
One day, sitting in traffic, Stella Sweeney attempts a good deed. The resulting car crash changes her life. But in this event is born the seed of something which will take Stella thousands of miles from her old life, turning an ordinary woman into a superstar, wrenching her whole family apart. For the first time real, honest-to-goodness happiness is just within her reach. But is Stella Sweeney, Dublin housewife, ready to grasp it?
"Not One Of Her Best"
What happens when the haggling is done and the shops are closed? When the quest has been given, the steeds saddled, and the adventurers are off to their next encounter? They keep the world running, the food cooked, and the horses shoed, yet what adventurer has ever spared a thought or concern for the Non-Player Characters? In the town of Maplebark, four such NPCs settle in for a night of actively ignoring the adventurers drinking in the tavern when things go quickly and fatally awry.